Red Riding Hood was directed by Catherine Hardwicke, who was fired from the Twilight franchise after she helmed the first movie, and written by David Johnson, whose only other screenwriting credit is for Orphan, the endlessly mocked twist-ending movie about something being wrong with Esther from a couple years ago. Considering that kind of pedigree at the wheel, I think you have an idea of how this is going to go.
It's just a rumor for now, but word on the blogosphere is that Amanda Seyfried may play Cinderella in a live-action adaptation of the Disney film. It makes sense, considering the box office bonanza that was Alice in Wonderland, not to mention Enchanted, which was basically about a Disney Princess who comes to life. And since you know that a live-action Cinderella will make a mint, the rest of the princesses can't be too far behind, which is why we're looking at the young actresses of Hollywood to see who could play the rest of the royal family. Here are our choices.
In Hollywood, apparently all you need to establish "nerdy" is a pair of glasses, limp hair and some frumpy clothing. Unfortunately, while unusual-looking leading men are plentiful in Hollywood, unusual-looking leading women must be in short supply, because the movies have a tendency to "nerd up" gorgeous young starlets and try to convince us that they are friendless outcasts. In Jennifer's Body, Amanda Seyfried dons the glasses to play the nerdy, less-popular friend of Megan Fox, despite being every bit as pretty -- as if her friend wouldn't give her any fashion tips! Ellen Page will similarly nerd up for Whip It next month, and the pair have gotten us thinking about the other adorable women of Hollywood who have worn the glasses, the lab coats and the sweats of the nerd. Keep in mind that this list doesn't include the generally frumped-up (Cameron Diaz in Being John Malkovich), the nerdy-in-flashback (Drew Barrymore in Never Been Kissed) and the supermodel scientists that aren't even trying (any female mathematician or computer tech in a James Bond movie).
Please allow me this short rant. When I went to see Hellboy II, I walked into a theater that looked like a shrine to ABBA. There were at least five posters for Mamma Mia hanging from the ceiling. MM's star, Amanda Seyfried, stared accusingly at me from my popcorn and soda containers, as if to say "I can't believe you ordered a Diet Pepsi to go with that extra large tub of popcorn." The player piano in the lobby loudly played an ABBA tune that, absent the insipid lyrics, sounded prettier than I remembered. "I hate that song," said the pimply-faced teen who, a few seconds prior, had bogarted me into buying the aforementioned extra large popcorn "for just fifty cents more!" I looked at his name tag and understood where his ABBA hatred stemmed from: The tag said Fernando.
Whew! Finally, the summer is almost over, which means we don't have to look at any more pictures of Transformers 2 star Megan Fox and can move on to... What? She has another movie coming out? In which she stars as an evil high school student who likes having sex wiht boys but is actually a demon? Great. Now we can look forward to another month of photographs of her wearing red-carpet fashions and biting her tongue to make herself look either more or less attractive (we're not exactly sure which she's going for with that). Plus, more Diablo Cody talk-show appearances, to boot. Vloggers Omar and Pablo G. dissect the Jennifer's Body redband trailer -- and the Fox phenomenon herself -- in the latest installment of "Trailers Without Pity." Watch it below, or click here!
I need to start by saying that I am not an inordinately rabid fan of ABBA, nor am I a musical theater acolyte -- in fact I hate musicals for their campy, over-the-top cheesiness. Needless to say, I did not see Mamma Mia! on Broadway. I went to see an early screening of the film adaptation of said Broadway musical with a fair amount of trepidation. And I was pleasantly surprised by my lack of homicidal feeling once the closing credits rolled.
As the lights went down in the theater, I thought I knew what to expect from this formulaic-looking movie: A woman who's engaged gets swept up in a romantic adventure, finds love in the last place she expects and realizes that the man she's engaged to isn't right for her after all. It's a tale as old as the movies, although not quite as old as the story of Romeo and Juliet, which actually plays a much lesser role in the film. But the movie surprised me... It surprised me by telling this simple, classic tale in the most clumsy and ham-fisted way possible.
Nicholas Sparks is the new Michael Crichton or John Grisham -- insofar as he's more famous for the many movies based on his books as for the books themselves. Except where Crichton wrote about science and Grisham wrote about the law, Sparks writes about schmaltz. His latest schmaltz-fest, Dear John, looks to be yet another tale in the "tragic romance" vein, which makes us wonder if there's a formula to Sparks' books, or at least to the movies based on them. We parsed the plots of his five films to date -- and his upcoming movie with Miley Cyrus -- to see what threads they had in common. (Warning: While their books have been out for a while, the write-ups of the last two films on our list contain minor spoilers, although we could figure out their plots without even seeing them.)
Jennifer's Body, Diablo Cody's latest outing as a screenwriter, is a film of contradictions. I don't mean that in a negative way, but Jennifer's Body is a film that gives credit to teenagers while simultaneously making them look like morons. I'm starting to realize the beautiful nature of Cody's schtick. The dialogue she writes for teen characters overflows with the lukewarm tears of juvenile wisdom. I remember thinking that I knew everything when I was in high school, and Cody's characters portray the false sense of maturity that seems to go along with the pangs of adolescence.