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Eat Pray Love may be an excruciating-looking movie (I have to see it tonight; please feel sorry for me), but what I do like about it is its concise yet descriptive three-word title. More movies should employ this. Specifically, more Julia Roberts movies should employ this, so I've gone back through her most famous films and renamed them with three short phrases that really reflect the movies' most vital components.
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Camera... Action Jackson!, DVDs Unwrapped , Girls on Film, I Want My DVD, Lights, The Kongs of Comedy
I Want My DVD: Tuesday, August 25, 2009I Want My DVD was getting out of control, so drastic action has been taken. No, we haven't instituted a ban on Mickey Rourke -- the dude will act in anything, but we'll still cover all of his movies, even the weird ones. No, we've removed TV shows from the mix and given them their own home. For the latest television releases, you can check out TV on DVD over in the Telefile. All movie releases will remain right here, just in time for us to call out one of our favorite movies of the year, as well as a couple of the worst.
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Reviews of Movies We've Actually Seen
Eat Pray Love: Step Right Up to Watch a Rich White Lady Whine!Eat Pray Love is a movie based on a very popular memoir by Elizabeth Gilbert that I have never read for two simple reasons: it sounded awful, and the only people I know who unironically enjoyed it are Oprah (whom I don't know personally) and women who also enjoyed In Her Shoes and The Time Traveler's Wife. Naturally, I avoided it like the plague. So imagine my delight when I had to sit down and watch the movie version of it. Just one question -- is the woman this awful in the book? Because this character was excruciating enough to watch for over two hours, I can't even imagine what reading an entire book about her would be like.
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Sometime between her late-1980s debut and her late-'90s heyday, the winsome Julia Roberts earned the title "America's sweetheart." Heck, she even appeared in a 2001 movie called America's Sweethearts, although she ironically did not play one of the titular sweethearts. But is she really a sweetheart, or is she... a monster? In film after film, Roberts has played floozies, fakes and outright felons, and it seems to have done little to ruin her reputation. Now, in her new movie Duplicity, she's playing a corporate spy trying to steal someone else's research. We examined her rap sheet to see how she fell so far.
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Effing haaaaa!!!!!!!!!!! Finally, someone's seen fit to end the reign of terror that Elizabeth Gilbert's psycho-babble best-seller Eat, Pray, Love has wrought. Think, if you will, of the distinctly female quest for peace and sanity after a heart-rending breakup Gilbert explores in her tome, and then imagine its opposite: a cuckolded dude licking his wounds by going on an international sex and booze bender, only to come out the other side changed in no way whatsoever (ok that last part was just my own assumption based on previous dealings with dudes). That pretty much sums up the parody Drink, Play, F@#K, a comedy based on the forthcoming satire of the same name by writer Andrew Gottlieb (whose credits include work on the soon-to-air IFC series Z Rock). I sooooo see McConaughey or, like Seann William Scott in the starring role, don't you?
Incidentally, the big-screen version of EPL is being developed and rumor has it Julia Roberts is attached. In spite of my pesky X chromosomes, that's one movie you couldn't pay my ass to see. Well, alright you could pay me. But it'd have to be a lot. Like at least fifty bucks and a sixer of Zima. I know, I drive a hard bargain.
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