Abduction might be the funniest movie I've seen in a long time, but I'm quite positive that wasn't remotely the intention of anyone involved in creating it. And while some might put all of the blame on easy target Taylor Lautner (who is indeed not ready to anchor an action/drama), it isn't entirely his fault. He's surrounded by capable people with genuine talent (Alfred Molina, Jason Isaacs, Sigourney Weaver, Maria Bello) and a director (John Singleton) who is usually adept at action and violence (see Four Brothers and 2 Fast 2 Furious), all of whom fall down on the job here.
This Friday welcomes the release of the Runaways biopic, cleverly titled The Runaways, with Twilight stars Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning in the lead roles as Joan Jett and Cherie Currie, respectively. And while the movie actually looks like a lot of fun, that casting has been hilarious since the day it was announced. If this movie makes money and spawns a trend, we could have a whole pipeline full of tween-targeted biopics of people they've never heard of coming at us. Here are my predictions and suggestions for future musical biopics the tween audience can hilariously ruin.
First things first: I realize that no matter what I say about this movie, the Twi-hards are going to go see it. So if you fall into that category, go. I'm sure you'll love it (and you already got your tickets a month ago anyway), though I did hear quite a number of not-so-young ladies at the screening I attended complaining about the distinct lack of Edward (and Robert Pattinson's hair) in this film. But I'm guessing that most Twi-hards have read the books and are aware that this is the Jacob-centric installment. However, for the rest of the world that reads on here, be warned that spoilers abound.
As everyone knows by now, Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke isn't directing the sequel, New Moon. Apparently, she's being replaced by Chris Weitz, who previously directed The Golden Compass. Weitz reportedly has a "solid relationship" with the big wigs at Summit Entertainment and although Weitz's agency has not confirmed the deal, Summit has "stopped negotiations" with other director hopefuls. Pre-production for the film could begin as early as this Monday. This isn't the only big change looming, though, as Summit might be looking to replace their original Jacob Black.
Taylor Lautner, the werewolf with the chiseled abs from Twilight: New Moon, has just gotten a franchise of his own. He's been cast as the lead in Max Steel, a film adaptation of a cartoon and toy line from toymaker Mattel. Mattel is probably thrilled to have landed such a red-hot actor, since their He-Man movie seems to be mired in development hell; meanwhile, their chief rival Hasbro already has the Transformers and G.I. Joe franchises, plus Battleship and Monopoly in development. We'd worry about whether Lautner has the chops to carry a franchise -- remember, New Moon is only his fifth movie -- but something tells us he'll do just fine in the not-terribly-challenging role of a teenage kid who gets injected with nanites that make him into a super-powered secret agent. Check out Steel's origin story in condensed form below, then watch all three seasons on Hulu.
The popular Twilight novel series by Stephenie Meyer are being made into a movie by the same name. The story concerns Jacob Black, a sixteen-year-old boy from the Quileute tribe who can change into a werewolf, and his family's ancient rivalry with vampires. The actor chosen to play him is Taylor Lautner, who previously starred in The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl. As Jacob, he's trying to deal with school, family, a girl he's crushing on, a bad temper and sudden unexplained appearances of body hair. Just your everyday, normal high school stuff, in other words.
Recently, Lautner debuted his new Jacob hair. (Video here.) It looks like they may have grabbed an extra wig out of America Ferrara's trailer on the set of Ugly Betty and slapped it on this kid. Add a poncho and some braces and he's this close to being a plucky young assistant from Queens trying to make it in the cutthroat world of fashion magazine publishing. But Lautner has some considerable shoes to fill, if werewolves can be said to wear shoes... In the books, Jacob Black is an imposing, muscular figure nearly seven feet tall. The big screen version looks like he may find himself crushed under the weight of his own hair. That he can get around with that thing on his head at all is an accomplishment.
Perhaps he'll seem like more of a menacing canine once the sound track and slick editing and effects are added in. Expectations are likely to run high, considering the fan following the books have. If all else fails, they could wait a year before filming and hope the actor hits a serious growth spurt.