Now, being a semi-literate, heterosexual male, I didn't see Twilight. I mean, I wanted to, but I knew they were making a sequel, so I figured I had time to see the first one before the second came out. But now, all of a sudden, I'm seeing commercials for the new one, and it opens this weekend! It's been what, a few months since Twilight came out? I mean, I knew they were fast-tracking the thing, but this is ridiculous! I want to go see the new one, but I still only know the basic elements of the first, so I'm not even totally sure what's going on here, but this is what I think is going on in Twilight 2: Adventureland.