This weekend's theatrical releases featured a true clash of the box-office titans. In one corner, you had the big-budget remake of the swords-and-scorpions epic; in the other corner, you had Tyler Perry; in the third corner, you had Miley Cyrus in a Nicholas Sparks movie. But did anyone doubt that Clash of the Titans, with the support of the entire Greek Pantheon (and a sizable ad budget), would win the day? It earned $64 million beginning on Thursday, and is already halfway to recouping its budget without even having opened overseas yet. While there may not be a Clash 2 in the making, we see a remake of the similarly gods-and-monsters-infused Jason and the Argonauts in the future. Release the army of skeletons!

Tags: box office, Clash of the Titans, Miley Cyrus, Tyler Perry

Can you believe it's been almost 20 years since The Bodyguard came out? Whitney Houston was a youngish 29, and not yet crazy, and Kevin Costner played the man hired to keep the threatened pop singer safe. Well, now plans to remake the movie have resurfaced, and Warner Bros. is looking to cast an international pop star in the lead role. While Rihanna was suggested for the part almost two years ago, nobody is attached to this new iteration, so we thought we'd envision how the story might be tailored to today's biggest stars, and who might be hired to protect them.

Tags: Katy Perry, Ke$ha, Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus, Nicki Minaj, remake, Rihanna, The Bodyguard

This Friday welcomes the release of the Runaways biopic, cleverly titled The Runaways, with Twilight stars Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning in the lead roles as Joan Jett and Cherie Currie, respectively. And while the movie actually looks like a lot of fun, that casting has been hilarious since the day it was announced. If this movie makes money and spawns a trend, we could have a whole pipeline full of tween-targeted biopics of people they've never heard of coming at us. Here are my predictions and suggestions for future musical biopics the tween audience can hilariously ruin.

Tags: Chace Crawford, Channing Tatum, Dakota Fanning, iCarly, Justin Bieber, Kevin Jonas, Kristen Stewart, Miley Cyrus, Taylor Lautner, Taylor Swift, The Runaways, Zac Efron

Folks on the France set of John Travolta's One Night in Paris -- I mean, From Paris, With Love took a song from the Saturday Night Fever soundtrack and made it literal. Only this time, the lyrics were "Burn, baby, burn! Auto inferno!" According to the AP, a suspicious fire caused the filmmakers to suspend shooting in "in one of the Paris area's toughest housing projects." Ten automobiles were turned into car-b-ques by vandals, and the movie's producers sound surprised that such a thing could occur. What did they think they'd get in the roughest projects in Paris? A welcome wagon filled with wine and cheese?

Tags: Bolt, car fires, From Paris With Love, John Travolta, Miley Cyrus

You're probably as tired of me telling you about remakes as I am telling you about remakes. Like Will Rogers once said, "I don't make the news, I just report it." Variety reports that Hollywood's latest trip to the remake well is Alan Parker's 1987 Gothic gumbo Angel Heart. 21 producer Michael DeLuca will produce. Folks may remember this is the film that got Lisa Bonet rechristened "Lisa Bonaked" before she was practically booted off The Cosby Show. The Cos apparently didn't want to have the nude co-star of a sex-filled, R-rated movie on his family-oriented show, a small bit of hypocrisy that bit Bill on the Pudding Pop when he got busted doing "filth-flarn-flarn-filth" with a woman who wasn't his wife.

Tags: 21, Angel Heart, Hannah Montana, Lisa Bonet, Mickey Rourke, Miley Cyrus, remake, Robert DeNiro

OMG, you guys -- Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience is coming out this weekend, and we are soooo psyched. ...Just kidding, we aren't psyched. In fact we're trying to ignore it, because we hate their music and we hate their haircuts and we hate the fact that they seem to be the most popular band in America today. Not since Hanson mmmbopped their way into our spleens have we hated a band this much, and before you say that the Jonas Brothers are much better than Hanson, let us point out that that's like saying that Miley Cyrus is a better actress than Amanda Bynes. Since their popularity shows no sign of waning any time soon, we decided to brainstorm some ideas for Jonas Brothers 3D movies we'd actually like to see. Hopefully, the producers will take our suggestions to heart when extending the franchise.

Tags: 3D, Hanna Montana, Jonas Brothers, Miley Cyrus

Because parents haven't spent quite enough money taking their daughters to see the sold-out concerts, or getting them the latest glittery T-shirts and posters, next year will bring them a brand spanking new Hannah Montana movie.

If you've been living under a rock with no Disney Channel, no children, and no retail outlet of any kind, then you may not have heard of Hannah Montana. This is probably a total of two people on the planet. Every kid I see walking home from school seems to have Hannah on a backpack, book cover, or purse. The girl is everywhere you look. In her next movie, she's even going to be at home. Miley Ray Cyrus, who plays the character, has said her next big-screen venture will feature Miley Stewart going back to Tennessee. More specifically, she'll be in Nashville.

"Wait," you may be saying from under your rock. "What does Nashville have to do with Montana, and is she Miley Cyrus or Miley Stewart or Martha Stewart?"

Let me explain: Miley Cyrus plays Miley Stewart plays Hannah Montana. (Maybe the girl picked a rhyming name as a memory trick to help keep things straight.) Miley Stewart moved from Tennessee to Malibu in order to pursue her secret dream of being a pop star in the form of Hannah Montana. It's this whole secret identity thing. Like Superman and Clark Kent, only with a blond wig and pink lipgloss, and with even more power to melt parents' wallets. The new film, says Cyrus, will feature more of her "normal girl" Stewart role than her pop star alter ego, although I would bet good money that Hannah will still be a big marketing point.

So start saving up now--both money and vacation days. The kids are going to want to be first in line for each of the ten times they see the movie.

Tags: hannah montana, miley cyrus

Forbes has come out with its list of "Hollywood's Top-Paid Tweens", and most of the stars who made it are no longer pre-teens themselves. But, as Forbes notes, "the bulk of their work still caters to that advertiser-beloved tween set." Tied for the top spot with a mind-blowing $25 million each are Hannah Montana's fifteen-year-old Miley Cyrus and Harry Potter's nineteen-year-old Daniel Radcliffe.

Tags: Ashley Olsen, Daniel Radcliffe, Hannah Montana, Harry Potter, High School Musical, Mary Kate Olsen, Miley Cyrus, Zac Efron