Are the Wachowski Brothers crazy geniuses, or just plain crazy? Speed Racer is a strong argument for the latter. First of all, this should be a kids' movie (or a movie for people who were kids when the cartoon was popular), but they seem to want us to take it somewhat seriously. It looks like a cartoon -- all bright primary colors -- but they also want us to feel like something big is at stake and Speed Racer's life is at risk or something. But, let's face it: Even if this movie weren't a completely CGI'ed Crayola advertisement, it would still be difficult to take anything seriously that has Emile Hirsch, Susan Sarandon, Matthew Fox and Christina Ricci in such ridiculous wardrobes and haircuts (not to mention some of the lines they have to utter, including Ricci's "Cool beans"). If the movie weren't cartoonish and the characters could be taken more seriously, there would still be the problem of our title character's name. My advice: When you turn a cartoon into a live-action film, maybe you should give your title character a real name so that you don't have to try to make viewers believe that people would actually call him "Speed" or "Speed Racer." I realize that people like Jason Lee name their kids Pilot Inspektor, but people in the non-Hollywood version of the real word are going to have a hard time buying into a guy being called Speed Racer. If you can put the many ridiculous concepts aside, or if you're a hard-core fan of the original Speed Racer, or, especially, if you are on some really good drugs, you're gonna love this.

Reviews by people who have actually seen it:
Variety
Rotten Tomatoes