The First Basket is the movie we've all been waiting for: a Jewish basketball documentary. No, really. Someone has finally brought this long-awaited (and quite specific) genre film to life. I kid only because I'm ignorant. When I think of things that go together, I just do not think "Jewish" and "basketball." I'm not sure why. The trailer says, "Before Michael Jordan," Kobe, Magic, Larry Byrd, there were a bunch of Jewish basketball players. Who knew? Well, these filmmakers did -- as do the guys who are interviewed for this doc. They're all old, former players, who grabbed onto basketball as their way to feel more American and less Jewish -- and to rebel against their families, who thought they were wasting their time and squandering their possibility. If the trailer is to be believed, these guys created the game as we know it today, and we wouldn't have the NBA in its current form without them. Oh, and apparently, I'm not the only one who didn't realize Jews and basketball go together like Jordan and Pippen, because even the trailer voiceover guy ends by saying "Really? Who knew?" Yeah, that's what I said.

Reviews by People Who've Actually Seen It:
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Finally, a romantic comedy concept we haven't already seen a million times before: In The Other End of the Line, a guy actually falls in love with the Indian girl in the outsourced call center after his credit card is declined because of possible fraud. That's actually the concept. And I know it's incredibly difficult to believe this movie hasn't already been made, what with the romantic feelings and longing we all feel when we end up on the phone in one of these situations. Oh, wait, those aren't the feeling we feel; it's frustration and anger -- not exactly the recipe for love and marriage. But if you put very beautiful people like Jesse Metcalf and Shriya Sayan into the mix, the love can't help but blossom. Because they can tell how beautiful the other one is just based on the phone call. But even if I forgive the ridiculous concept, I cannot forgive the filmmakers for expecting me to believe that he could ever call the call center girl directly. I have had to deal with call centers like these, and if only they would let me call the same person back, I would not have spent eight months and a great deal of rage trying to get a refund from one particular airline (coughUnitedcough), because I would have just called back the person who supposedly helped me in the first place. Although, if I could have called that same person back, we'd probably have ended up dating, and my refund wouldn't have mattered at all. Yeah. Right. Not buying it.

Reviews by People Who've Actually Seen It:
Rotten Tomatoes

For a truly terrifying Halloween horror flick, British thriller Eden Lake should fit the bill. It's about a couple who goes away for the weekend on a nice, romantic, idyllic getaway that ends up shattered by... oh, you know, the teenagers who turn out to be torturous murderers. Our protagonists, a (formerly) happy couple, have to literally fight for their lives against a band of heathens, who at first seem like nothing more than bratty, entitled youths; then they seem like trouble-making pranksters. But when it turns bloody and brutal, you realize even seemingly harmless teens can be evil. Kids today... they're always trying to torture and murder innocent people for no reason at all. I remember when I was young, we would only do that if someone deserved it. You know, like Dexter. Seriously, though, remember Lord of the Flies and Pet Semetary? Anytime you have young people as the villains in a movie, it's freaking disturbing in the most unsettling way.

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Indie horror film Splinter (not to be confused with either of the 2006 movies or the 1999 one of the same name) has been offering sneak peeks around the country to try to build some enthusiasm for its big opening this weekend (and by "big opening," we mean it's opening on four screens. But, hey, it's an actual opening, not just more sneak peeks, so that's something... ). Anyway, it's about some people who get kidnapped, but that's not the scary part. They end up trapped in a convenience store with their kidnapper, when some sort of creature with splinters (?!) appears outside and starts trying to get them. And these splinters? They kill! Ooh, scary. I will never be able to touch a piece of wood again for fear of a killer splinter. Barely familiar faces Shea Whigham, Paul Costanzo (remember Joey? If you do, I'm very sorry...), and Jill Wagner try with all their might to be earnest and afraid, but it's still hard to muster any fear about splinters.

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Variety
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The documentary Run for Your Life tells the story of road runner Fred Lebow, who created the New York City marathon (the world's largest marathon, by the way). If you don't know much about Lebow, you might expect some superstar runner who you couldn't relate to, but Lebow was just a slow runner (one person interviewed in the film says he ran like a duck) who cared about New York and wanted to bring people together through running. There was Scotch involved, and other irreverent stuff you'd never expect in a marathon. But Lebow did end up being truly inspirational: He wanted the marathon course to go through all five boroughs, even though people were worried about crime in the Bronx, because he wanted it to be New York's marathon. And it was, and still is to this day. He's credited with helping spur the country's fitness craze that has since become such a dominant part of our lives and culture. So, okay, I take back the stuff about him not being some superstar runner; he was. But he was also just an ordinary guy who did something extraordinary. This type of documentary is a lot more fun to watch than those on some more heated controversial topics.

Reviews By People Who've Actually Seen It:
Variety

Halloween weekend needs to have at least one scary movie opening in wide release, and this year we have The Haunting of Molly Hartley. The concept is basically The Reaper, minus the humor and originality. I mean, how many times have we seen the devil possess (or attempt to possess) someone's soul in a scary movie? Countless. But it's a lot more interesting to have that concept occur in a comedy. Though, judging by the ratings for Reaper, most people don't seem to agree with me.

It's a good thing everyone seems to like Seth Rogen, because he's getting a little difficult (maybe even impossible?) to escape. He cornered the market on Apatow-brand comedy, and has moved on to Kevin Smith's Zack and Miri Make a Porno (in addition to making his movies which take funny things like cancer as their subject matter). His co-star is Elizabeth Banks, which might make you worry that it will be a lot more of naked Seth having sex with a much hotter girl, like we were forced to endure in Knocked Up. But don't worry; that's not what it's about. No, Zack and Miri are not making a porno together. Well, they are, but they're not starring in it. They're just a couple of broke losers who decide to produce a porno so that they can pay their rent and their bills. And if it keeps up the funny that we get in the redband trailer (mostly thanks to Craig Robinson, aka Darryl from The Office), we're in for a treat. It's really dirty and features a predictably large proportion of f-bombs, but -- spoiler alert! -- we do get to see Seth Rogen almost naked again, when he and Miri are showing the auditioning "actors" how to strut around. And as disturbing as naked Seth Rogen is, it's also wonderful and hilarious that he's willing to put himself out there like that, pregnant-looking belly and all.

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Variety
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I was just thinking that we needed a vampire movie to come out soon. I mean, there's nothing else about vampires going on right now in the world, is there? Oh, right, there's Twilight, and True Blood, and even Dark Path. But in case that's not enough vampires for you, there is also Let the Right One In. The thing that sets this one apart, though, particularly from Twilight, which we is already shaping up to be a mega-hit a month before its release, is that it's truly dark. Not faux-dark, where the girl kisses the vampire, and we all get warm fuzzy feelings because he's a good guy. [Ed's note: Also, it's in Swedish -- Lauren] You know, because Edward Cullen is always Angel, never Angelus -- a vampire with a soul. No one you have to worry about. Oh, and he's hot and wonderful, and brings Bella out of her shell.

Kristin Scott Thomas might well receive an Oscar nom for her star turn in the French film I've Loved You So Long. Already a film festival and critical darling , it follows two sisters, on of whom -- Scott Thomas's character -- just got out of prison after 15 years after serving a sentence for murder. So you just know her character will be dark and complicated - just the type of role that makes for meaty acting -- and that there aren't enough of for women in Hollywood. (Remember, this film is French. And it was made by a writer and university professor, not by a famous filmmaker.)

Angelina Jolie took time out from adopting and having babies with Brad Pitt to make Changeling, Clint Eastwood's latest film. And that makes complete sense, because anyone would take a break from their real life to make a movie with Clint, right? Especially lately, as his movies seem to be getting better and better. (Note: Spike Lee does not agree.) On the other hand, what's happened to Angelina Jolie? Maybe it's just the trailer and she'll wow me with the movie, but she looks like she's doing some serious overacting here. Case in point: At one point, she screams, "I want my son back!" Then beats her chest as she screams louder, "I want MY son back!" The movie is based on a true story -- according to Wikipedia, it was inspired by the Wineville Chicken Coop Murders. The movie focuses on the case of one mother looking for her missing son. It looks like the police give her a boy who isn't her real son, but when she raises a fuss about it, they end up having her committed. Last time Angelina was in a mental institution in a film, she won an Oscar. Will it happen again this time?

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Do not mistake Passengers for Rachel Getting Married, that other, better Anne Hathaway movie currently in theaters. No, Passengers is the one that had its release date delayed a week before it was originally supposed to hit theaters. Since delayed release dates tend to be a sign that something's wrong with a movie, I'm going to count that as strike one against Passengers. Second strike against it is that cheesy announcer guy in the trailer, all "There were ten survivors of flight 117." Okay, we get it. It's about some passengers or something. And then there's the fact that Patrick Wilson's character comes back with "a gift" in the form of superpowers (mental and physical) that seem to be on Heroes levels of ridiculousness.Oh, and strike four (I know; there are only supposed to be three; whatever): Anne Hathaway and Patrick Wilson appear to be naked together in a scene in the trailer, even though he's HER PATIENT. Maybe that's part of her treatment regiment?

I don't necessarily have a problem with the third installment in the High School Musical series being a theatrical release. It's nothing I'll run out and see, but the success of the franchise certainly warrants the fanfare. What I do have a problem with, though, is that the movie is called High School Musical 3: Senior Year, when the majority of cast members are in their 20s. Monique Coleman will, in fact, be 28 next month. And remember these people are high school seniors. In other words, 17- and 18-year-olds. I think it might have worked better if they'd jumped forward five years, a la One Tree Hill, so that the actors would be playing somewhat closer to their actual ages. But I guess with shows from The O.C. to Veronica Mars to Gossip Girl and pretty much every other teen show ever made, I should go ahead and get used to the 20-somethings playing teenagers.

Yes, Pride and Glory has Colin Farrell and Edward Norton (both selling points, in my opinion), but it also has a tagline that's so long I lost interest before I got all the way through it ("Truth. Honor. Loyalty. Family. What are you willing to sacrifice?"). And, no, it's not my short attention span. I have a perfectly normal-sized attention span, but not for taglines. They're supposed to be short and snappy. The trailer makes the movie look mildly interesting. Edward Norton's the good-guy cop trying to figure out who killed a bunch of other cops. Turns out it might have been another cop, Colin Farrell, who also happens to be Norton's brother-in-law. But Norton's good through and through, so he doesn't want to cover anything up, even if it's his own family -- and pretty much everyone in the movie is Norton's family; the old, wise detective played by Jon Voight is his father and another cop, Noah Emmerich, is his brother -- or the pride and glory of the honorable police force.

The Saw franchise puts out more movies more often than any movie franchise ever, I'd wager. The first movie, Saw, was a surprise hit when it was released in 2004. Here we are, four years later, and we're all the way up to Saw V. It's probably good for fans of the films, though, since there are always so many questions left unanswered at the end of each movie that we can only hope get addressed in the next movie. (Good news, then: Saw VI was being written at the same time as Saw V, so we'll probably have another installment in the first part of 2009.) Saw V has a regular trailer and a redband clip. The all-ages trailer doesn't show much, but it still manages to utterly creep me out. It has Luke from Gilmore Girls (this is a far cry from Stars Hollow, don't you think?) with his head in some sort of clear box. He's clearly trapped, waiting for the clues from Jigsaw to tell him what sort of torture he must endure to get out. We don't get to see what happens.

Don't you just love when you watch a movie that's supposed to send some sort of positive message about gay rights, but instead falls into the trap of using every gay stereotype in existence. Because it's funny! Gay people are so funny. Tru Loved is such a movie, even if it's trying to disguise itself by having its title character be a straight girl named Tru. (Also, giving your character a weird name just so that you can use it as a pun in the title automatically lowers the quality of your movie; keep this in mind, filmmakers). Anyway, Tru has two moms (and two dads). Her moms move her from the safe gay haven of San Francisco to ... somewhere more homophobic. She meets a closeted gay football player who her extremely gay dads tell her is extremely gay. And then she meets another gay guy, and since she's straight, she decides to start a Gay Straight Alliance. Which, wait, I think I saw this episode of Queer as Folk already. You know, what with the Gay Straight Alliance and the closeted gay football player, I wonder if Tru will find a boyfriend? Or if she'll get her closeted gay friend to admit he's gay in front of the whole bigoted school? Don't let me ruin the ending for you, but I'm guessing both of these things will happen. Then all of the gay people and straight people will live happily ever after, thanks to Tru (Loved!) and her Gay Straight Alliance. I love the movies!

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I sort of hate the trend of making a movie about a historical event that's happened so recently that we lack the distance and perspective that would allow us to look back and really examine it, but who am I to question Oliver Stone on his decision to make W., right? Well, I might be no one, but I am still going to question the film, because ... first of all, did we really need a movie about George W. Bush? I mean, is there anyone in the world who wants to sit in a theater for three hours and watch a film about that? Also, Josh Brolin as Bush seems like really strange casting choice to me, unless he's much older or Bush is much younger than I think. I get that the tagline is "Anybody can grow up to be president," so it's probably about his younger life and all that, but it still annoys me. And that tagline annoys me too, because Bush isn't exactly "Anybody," what with his president father and governor brother. And can I just ask: What is with the period in the title? I get that it would be there if you wrote out his name, but it's weird how much the focus is on it. For example, on the official site, they put a period after everything: "Trailer." "About the film." "Cast and crew." Is that some sort of symbolic thing I am too dumb (or apolitical) to get? As for that trailer, well, it makes it look like the movie might be equal parts jabs at Bush's presidential fumbles (Bushisms, mostly) and a cynical look at his past (no doubt his frat-boy, draft-dodging past certainly wouldn't be worthy of a film if he weren't president). Other than the divine choice to cast James Cromwell as the first President Bush, though, they sure prettied up the rest of the real-life people here: Elizabeth Banks as Laura Bush is ridiculous. Ellen Burstyn as Barbara? Yeah, Barbara wishes. And Thandie Newton as Condoleezza Rice? I don't know what Stone and the casting folks were smoking when these decisions made, but may I please have some?

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Variety
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Director Mike Leigh, who last brought us the dark (and Oscar-nominated) abortion rights drama Vera Drake, apparently found that movie as gloomy as everyone else did and decided to get happy for his next movie. That's how we ended up with Happy-Go-Lucky, which centers around a teacher named Poppy who is extremely happy despite the fact that she should, by all accounts be miserable. (She's single, she doesn't know how to drive, she can't dance, etc.) She stays happy through it all, which could be completely annoying except that Sally Hawkins, who plays Poppy, really seems to sell it in a way that's sweet without being saccharine and genuine without being precious. It looks like she'd utterly believable in the unbelievably happy role. And because she's happy and other people are not, all sorts of mishaps ensue: She pokes fun at a pregnant woman's expanding belly and the pregnant woman thinks Poppy's being mean and rubbing it in (she's not). Then there's her driving teacher, who is enraged that she doesn't already know how to drive. And her dance instructor, who tries to get Poppy to be less happy by sharing her own tales of her depressing life, sending the dance instructor -- but not Poppy -- spiraling into a breakdown. Since it is from Mike Leigh, it will probably have its serious moments and will not just be a fluffy, rom-com with a happy ending. But even if it doesn't get any deeper, there's nothing wrong with escaping to a happy movie in a dark theater for a couple hours.

Reviews By People Who've Actually Seen It:

Variety
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First of all, the obvious question: What is the deal with bees and beekeepers lately? They're everywhere. Have you noticed? First there was the couple on The Amazing Race, then the season premiere of Pushing Daisies, and now this movie, The Secret Life of Bees. I realize this one technically came first, since it's based on the bestseller of the same name, but I'm still counting it as a recent development in our culture's growing obsession with bees, since the movie's happening now. Anyway, about the film: It stars Dakota Fanning, which makes me immediately less inclined to give it a chance (although she did make Houndog, which makes me want to cut her some slack). But I'll try not to judge the trailer any more harshly than I would anything else (which might not be saying all that much).

There's really only one thing to talk about when it comes to Filth and Wisdom: It's Madonna's directorial debut. Yes, the same Madonna who had never made a good movie choice in her life. And, really, I've never held that against her. After all, music has always been her thing, so her film career didn't have to matter. Until now. Because if you are going to try your hand at directing films, and directing isn't your chosen career, I'd hope your past movie experience would at least give us a glimpse into why it's a viable option. Madonna's does not. Really. She was okay in Evita and A League of Their Own, but okay is not enough.

Max Payne is based on a videogame, but is there any hope it'll be as good as Lara Croft: Tomb Raider and its sequel? I kid -- obviously, it wouldn't take much to be as good or better than the Tomb Raider films -- but only sort of. Because all of the Marilyn Manson music; large black winged creatures carrying dead (or passed out?) humans; and the hotness of Mark Wahlberg in the trailer (and why exactly is Wahlberg seen so little in the trailer of a movie that he's the star of, anyway?) cannot cover up the fact that Max Payne looks decidedly lacking in substance. Of course it's pretty. There's candlelight; artsy-looking explosions; dark, industrial architecture; Mila Kunis; and did we mention Mark Wahlberg? But prettiness is not enough to cover up a movie that has nothing to it. Maybe it's precisely because it's based on a videogame, or maybe it's because the filmmakers failed here, but this movie doesn't seem to have much beneath the surface.

This Robert De Niro film, What Just Happened, is more than a little different from last month's big budget mess, Righteous Kill. It's one of those low-budget movie he makes between high-paying films for art's sake and all of that. In What Just Happened, De Niro's not afraid to look and act his age without being the tough guy. He plays an aging Hollywood producer with two ex-wives and two separate families dealing with his personal and professional life as a series of crises ensue (example: Bruce Willis shows up to a movie fat and sporting "a Grizzly Adams beard"). Oh, did I mention Bruce Willis is playing himself? Points for self-deprecation. And while it's sort of unbelievable that someone De Niro's age would be married to Robin Wright Penn in the real world, it's actually credible in Hollywood. Luckily, this movie is set in Hollywood so it works here. Even in the course of the trailer, you might find yourself rooting for the estranged pair to reunite, which I'm guessing is going to be the crux of the movie: He can't get over her, for obvious reasons, but she's moved on to seeing someone else -- a married man. Nice. And for an added bonus, What Just Happened has so many fine actors in bit parts -- Sean Penn, Catherine Keener, Stanley Tucci, John Turturro -- that it's worth seeing for them alone.

Reviews By People Who've Actually Seen It:
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It's a good thing we don't make a habit of judging movies based on first impressions, or we'd totally hate Breakfast With Scot for the main photo on its website alone. Oh, wait, that's totally how we judge movies here. So yeah, what is with the creepy-looking kid in the weird clothes? And, speaking of clothes, why do there need to be so many different colors coming at me here? It's hurting my eyes! This is a "message" movie, and the message seems to be: Root for the Toronto Maple Leafs. No, seriously, that's the message. Because it's the first time a professional sports league has allowed the use of its team name, mascot, logo, and more in a gay-themed movie (or TV show, if you'll remember the Pittsburgh Ironmen on Queer as Folk?). So score one for the Maple Leafs. But what about the movie? First of all, we are supposed to believe Tom Cavanaugh, who is nearing 45, is a professional hockey player. Really? Oh, and also, he's gay. And he and his partner end up somehow adopting a kid. And this kid is the craziest-looking kid in the history of cinema. Anyway, nothing about the trailer was a bit compelling or made me want to watch at all. Except for those Maple Leafs, of course. Go Maple Leafs!
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There's a really creepy, realistic feel to the poster, trailer, and website for Quarantine. The text on said website makes the whole business seem like a long-buried news story. Something to the effect that on March 11, 2008, the government sealed off an apartment complex in L.A. with no details, no witnesses, nothing. The residents were never seen again. And now we're getting the whole story. In the form of the movie. It's very Blair Witch, whose website still says something about students disappearing in the woods in 1994, and their footage being found a year later. Yeah, I know it's fake, just like I know Quarantine is fake, but do they have to be so creepy?

It's hard to tell whether City of Ember is a pretty awesome-looking kids' movie, or a movie that appeals to the adults in the family too. It's definitely an action movie (tagline: "Escape is the only option") starring young actors in the lead roles. But it also looks dark and trippy and mysterious. It's a little bit of a puzzle trying to figure out what is going on in this movie from the trailer. It says "To save the human race, an underground city was built, to last only 200 years." That opening sentence alone brings up many questions: Was the entire human race placed in ONE city? Because that is one big city! Or were only certain people chosen? Or only survivors - kind of like an underground Battlestar Galactica? And why will it last only 200 years? And what were the humans being saved from? Okay, so obviously, the movie is set during the time when the 200 years is almost up, and some teens are charged with figuring out a way out. A creepy-looking Bill Murray plays the leader of the city, and Tim Robbins is some stiff who's either helping the kids or being a total weirdo and trying to sabotage them. You can't tell from the clip. I do sense that the movie will end with them finding a way out of the city, which I guess sort of makes it a kids' movie. On the other hand, this apocalyptic theme is sort of bleak for most kids. So maybe the target audience is young adults? Adults? I give up. You're welcome to go see this. And if you have a clue what this movie is trying to do or say, please let me know.

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At first glance, RockNRolla looks like a sort of British answer to the Ocean's 11 series. Gerard Butler, Tom Wilkinson, and Thandie Newton star, with supporting turns from character actors such as Idris Elba (whom we know so well from The Wire, of course). Upon closer examination, though, you find out this is from Guy Ritchie, who brought us terrific movies like Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch, but who's also responsible for the terrible Madonna vehicle Swept Away. Just judging from the trailer -- and that's all I have to go by at this point, right? -- this looks to take more after Lock, Stock than the Madge flick. And Tom Wilkinson as a bald tough guy is scary. Seriously. It's a far cry from the weak, scared man he played -- and garnered an Oscar nod for -- in In the Bedroom, that's for sure.

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You hear a title like Sex Drive and you probably think, "Oh, this must be by the same people who made Superbad, right? And it must be about some geeky adolescent boys trying to get laid. You'd pretty much be right. Oh, and it wants you to know just how dirty it is right away, because you can't access the site without entering in your age (and,of course, no kids will lie just to get in and watch the red-band trailer, right?). But, anyway, once you're in, you'll find that these kids might actually be more geeky and more desperate than the dudes in Superbad. Here's who we're dealing with: a guy who is "practicing being a dick" to a girl he met online. Oh, and his day job? He is dressed in a costume that appears to be, like, a Mexican donut or something. It's hard to tell, but it's humiliating regardless. The dude's friend, played by Clark Duke from Greek, wears great big paisley shirts. And there is a disturbingly awesome (or awesomely disturbing) James Marsden as, like, a white trash older brother of one of the geeks. He's like one of the Duke brothers, only worse, because this is rated R. His car has a license plate that says "NOFATCHX," and freaks when he finds out his brother met someone online. Oh, and Seth Green plays an Amish buggy driver. Don't ask. And, finally, in a sequence so horrifyingly awful that I am afraid to retype it for fear it might make me dumber, a cop tries to arrest our main character while he's wearing his donut suit, and the cop actually thinks the donut is a "big Mexican." He tasers him, and even sprays Mace in his big foam eye. No, really. This is what is passing for comedy these days.

The Express is not a movie about the non-polar version of The Polar Express. Of that I can assure you. This is a football movie about Ernie Davis, the first black player to win the Heisman. Dennis Quaid (man, does that guy love sports movies or what?) plays his coach. Based on the tear-sheet-looking graphics at the official site, maybe "The Express" refers to the name of a newspaper? (In actual fact, I looked it up, and apparently Ernie Davis was referred to as "The Elmira Express," because he went to high school in Elmira, New York. Don't make fun: I never claimed to know anything about sports.) Anyway, the movie looks like it does a good job getting the historic feel down. The film is grainy-looking, the clothes and sets look authentic. Even the hairstyles look right out of the 1960s. This movie appear to be a notch above your typical sports flick (sort of like The Rookie was; Quaid must know a good sports movie when he sees one). And anyway, I don't think I could make fun of this one even if I wanted to. Because when I looked up Davis, I also discovered that SPOILER ALERT he was drafted (the first black player to be drafted first overall) but never got a chance to play because he got leukemia a year later. If the movie spans further than his Heisman win, you'll want to bring plenty of Kleenex.

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So, Body of Lies is that movie that stars DiCaprio! And Crowe! You might have heard about it. Or read about it. Or seen a trailer. At this point, it would have been almost impossible to have avoided it. I guess this is what happens when you put two superstars in a movie together and open it on a week when there isn't much else of note at movie theaters. Oh, and also? Russell Crowe gained lots of weight for this role. He is such a good actor that he managed to get fatter, something that pretty much every person in this country does as he or she gets older and their metabolism slows down. So good for you, Russell. (Leonardo DiCaprio, on the other hand, does not seem to have gained any weight for the role. Just FYI.)

It feels like Greg Kinnear was in a new movie just a few weeks ago (because he was: Ghost Town). He must be trying to set a record or something, because he also stars in Flash of Genius, about the guy who invented the intermittent windshield wiper (no, really; that's what it's about) only to have the invention stolen from him by Ford. It claims to be based on a true story, and SPOILER ALERT it holds up (that link is to a news story, though, so don't read if you don't want to know how it all turned out in real life). It sounds like the silliest concept in the world, right? I mean, most of us have just taken our intermittent windshield wipers for granted, and haven't thought about who might've invented them -- let alone a guy who sued an auto giant for millions of dollars for stealing said invention. But, judging by the trailer, this actually looks like a terrific movie, with fantastic performances from Kinnear, Lauren Graham, Dermot Mulroney, and Alan Alda. After all, everything started out as someone's idea. Even something as mundane as the windshield wiper.

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Rotten Tomatoes

If there's anything I like less than a spoof, it's ... No, there's actually nothing I like less than a spoof, which is why I find An American Carol to be so utterly offensive and annoying. I get that it's a David Zucker film, and he's the guy who (sort of) brought us the (sort of) classic, Airplane! But it's also a David Zucker film, and he's the guy who brought us several Naked Gun films and Superhero Movie. In other words, even when it comes to spoofs (which lack originality by their very nature), this should be unoriginal. It will be a churned out, irrelevant mess. Don't believe me? Watch the trailer. First of all, it's a spoof of Michael Moore, who is so last year (or five years ago, but who's counting?) And the cast includes some of the best talentless hacks in the business, from Gary Coleman to Kelsey Grammer to Leslie Nielsen to Trace Adkins (yes, the country singer who gave the world Honky Tonk Badonkadonk). And if that's not enough for you, there are lesbian jokes (he thinks they're men! Get it?) and Muslim jokes (they all have the same name! So hilarious.) and every other offensive, stupid, or outdated joke you can think of.

You probably think you know what Rachel Getting Married is about just from that title, right? Well, you'd be right. It is about a girl named Rachel (the lovely Rosemarie DeWitt, from Mad Men) who is, in fact, getting married. But that's not really the point of the movie. That's more of the backdrop for telling the story of a dysfunctional family who gets together to bond and scream and fight and hug and cry. Anne Hathaway really stretches to play the bride's sister, a train wreck who really puts the dysfunctional in the family. I know I've only seen the trailer, but my guess is that Anne was upset at being the only person in Brokeback Mountain not nominated for an Oscar, so she went out and found herself an Oscar bait role. And it looks like she totally owns it in a way I would not have expected from the princess of Princess Diaries. The movie looks touching and poignant. The trailer oversells it a bit with the whole "This is not your family. But this is your family." But I'll forgive it that, and give the movie a chance on its own merits and pedigree (it's directed by Jonathan Demme and co-stars Debra Winger).

Reviews By People Who've Actually Seen It:
Variety
Rotten Tomatoes