So You Think You Can Dance
Auditions #4: Atlanta

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Auditions #4: Atlanta

We get a montage of people we may or may not being watching later in further detail. Perhaps most notable is the group that recreates the stair dancing from the parade scene in Ferris Bueller's Day Off, which is a movie that came out three years before most of Nigel's favourite contestants were born.

Kippery Rigsby does what she calls "skreet" hip-hop, and the producer off-camera is all, "Did you say 'street'?" and she's all, "Yeah, skreet." She's terrible, but we already know that from the promos they've been showing us. Nigel discerns that the dance training she says she's received was a con, because she shouldn't have to pay $1,400 to dance for agents. Then he says "keeping it real," and we spend on awful lot of time on her given how terrible she is, and how miserable she looks. She also admits she's never seen the show, possibly because she can't afford a television with all the money she's spent on con-job "dance workshops."

Matthew Krabbe, 22, of Seneca, SC, calls himself a new-age cowboy, with his rhinestone-and-suede suit. Shane calls him a "little freak" during the routine, which is just a lot of high-energy sort of line-dancing, with some twirling thrown in. The judges all seem to find it entertaining. Really? Did they edit out the entertaining part? Despite how "entertaining" they found it, he's not moving on, and he complains about how "they only saw the cowboy" and not everything he could do, or some such. Dude, you dressed yourself.

Jessica Diaz, 30, of New York has some kind of cat outfit on, and her routine is basically pretending to be a cat. A stripper cat. You know, this is kind of what I'd been hoping for, and now that it's here? It sucks. She's not moving on.

Chris Garmon, 25, of Winder, GA, lives on a seventy-five-acre cattle farm. He was a squad leader in the Marines. He got injured, and got sent home, and got depressed because instead of shooting actual people he can only shoot bottles on his farm. Okay, that's a little harsh. I'm fuzzy on what led him to dancing, but he enjoys getting out on the floor, not caring what people say. Unless they insinuate he might be gay, like when Nigel asks if he's seen Brokeback Mountain. Chris says he hasn't, nor does he care to. That's right. Audition for a dancing show, and insult gay people. Not that this show doesn't inexplicably encourage it, but still. Shane says it's no from him, but he likes Chris and his personality. Mary says he brings something to the table that a lot of people in the audience don't bring. Like what, homophobia and crazy-ass line-dancing? Nigel actually salutes him before sending him on his way. As with Matthew Krabbe, I'm not sure what the judges thought was entertaining about this guy. But I suppose I'd be mostly positive around a guy who's so accurate with an M-16 too.

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So You Think You Can Dance




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