Episode Report Card
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Club Dead

Fight time! One guy is thrashing another guy against a chain-link fence as bright lights shine on them. We pull back to reveal that this is video on a computer monitor. There are two fists and barbed wire on either side of the embedded video and the logo "LIVE! Or DIE!" up top. There are two buttons on either side as well: one for "LIVE" and one for "DIE." Is this Chloe, wearing a drab dark top and conservative hair, simply can't believe that there's a Krypto Fight Club on the internet. Did Chloe temporarily forget that it's the internet and that there's way sicker shit out there? Chloe asks why nobody knows about this. Clark says that Oliver told him the link and password cost more than most people make in a year. They see two guys rolling around in a ring and grunting. Chloe closes her eyes, apparently squeamish for the first time since the show started. I think her journalistic curiosity and toughness would win out over her apparent sudden inability to watch two people punch each other around. But then I'm not the one trying to change her whole character this week in an effort to let Lois come front and center in red leather. Clark watches the fighting, which doesn't look any more violent than what you'd see on any wrestling show. One guy gets choked and thrown on the ground. Oh! Heavens to Betsy! Merciful heavens! This is giving the dainty flower Chloe the vapors! Somebody get her some fresh air and smelling salts! What bullshit. Clark and Chloe keep watching as the guy on the ground tries to use a freeze ray from his hand. The other guy -- the one we saw at the beginning of the episode giving Clark a thrashing -- grabs him by the head, turns him around, and presents him to the camera. The on-screen cheap web graphics prompt the viewer to vote now. On the video, Kane whips out a steel spike from above his right hand. Apparently, the vote went "DIE!" (There were, apparently, some irregularities in the Ohio ballots.) Kane shoves the steel spike into the back of the opponent's neck. I liked it better when Titus Pullo did this. Clark looks sad. Chloe looks disgusted. Kane huffs and puffs at the camera as people applaud. Gravely, Chloe says, "Clark, he just killed that guy."

Clark asks Chloe to trace the site back to the source. She types. She says that they're bouncing the signal off a billion proxy servers. And the video still streams smoothly? Chloe says that the people running the site made sure nobody could find them. She asks if Oliver and Clark's "Super Pals" gave him any other information. Clark says that it was a short conversation, because he's been busy lately, but that Oliver thought the location of the fighting was nearby. Chloe says that the security on the site is "off the charts." Really? She says that she can't record or download the feed. That doesn't sound right. Can't you just output whatever's on the computer screen to a VCR or other recorder through a video card output? Chloe has also obviously never heard of Firefox plug-ins that let you do just that. The announcer on the video tries to do his sad shtick, declaring Titan/Kane the reigning champion. Folks cheer. Kane looks angry. Clark tells Chloe to freeze the frame. That she can do. Clark notices a detail on the guy's arm. Chloe is able to zoom in on it, even though she can't capture or do anything else with the video. It's an arm tattoo of Kryptonian symbols. Clark reads it, and says it's a prison tattoo. He figures out that Kane isn't meteor-infected. He's from the Phantom Zone. A scary sound plays. Oh shit!

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