America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Can Cry At The Drop Of A Hat

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Guess Who's Coming To Dinner

Yoanna was supposed to be '80s punk, and they all hate it. "I was a model in the '80s, and I don't remember makeup like that," Janice snarls. I guess being in the '80s can make a person crotchety.

Mercedes has painted her green face green as a "futuristic" babe. It works for most of the panel, though Tyra would have like to see her "prettify" it a bit. Her photo brings a ringing endorsement of "you were great" from Jay, and Nigel compliments her "booty," because when it's in a British accent, even saying he liked her "arse" would have been adorably acceptable.

Oh, Heather. Heather Heather Heather Heather Heather. She does a really good '80s punk, Janice going to far as to observe, "I adore the fuchsia!" Maybe Janice means the cresting wave of red and orangey colors that appears in front of Janice's face when she waves her hand really fast. Heather's shoot wasn't "intense" enough, Jay says, and a little fight breaks out on the panel (except without the inclusion of the little boy, who doesn't seem to have much to say, thus far) when Jay says he only found two selects of Heather's that were up to snuff. Nigel argues that "you only need one," but the elegant oratory of executive producer Banks hard-charges in, adding, "That's bull-crap, doing twenty rolls and only finding one." Instead, she says, what should happen is that there should be several good pictures "and one crazy one that's like pow!" Pow! Bang! Snerf! Is she a Batman comic?

They like Sara's '80s look, and Tyra notes that these girls really feel it for the '80s "because that's the era when you came out yo mamas." Yeah, no, it's official. She is definitely trying to contact the mother ship with a complex series of words and clicks, because she is a babbling lunatic today. Besides which, some of them were definitely born in the '70s, right? And they all love Sara's picture. Bing! Bam! Smim!

Jenascia turns to them in profile to show them her futuristic look, but even in their cooing I'll bet you they think she's too short.

Camille is doing futuristic, but Janice terms it "LSD makeup." No comment, people, when she does it for us herself. Her face is a mess of random symbols and body art, like she's just come from the face-painting booth at a Marilyn Manson County Fair and we've stopped her on her way to the Dead Animal Petting Zoo. The picture doesn't work for them, and Jay says Camille lacked all "intensity." When will the rest of them pipe down for a minute and let that little boy talk?

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America's Next Top Model




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