2:00 PM – 3:00 PM

Episode Report Card
Gustave: B | Grade It Now!
Sex, Lies, Videotape, Laptops, and Cell Phones

Back at the safe house, the results are in. The wand is blue. Bride is pregnant. She sits in the remarkably large bathroom and tries to deal with the news alone. Nina knocks on the door to tell her that she put some "clean clothes" on the bed.

Lady Mac is back. She enters the Palmer suite. Faux-licity has been summoned already, and is waiting for her in the clothes that were once lying in a pile in TakeOnKief's room. She asks Lady Mac why she hasn't left for Nevada yet. Lady Mac explains there's been a change of plans, and disappears into her bedroom. Faux-licity saunters over to a private corner and calls TakeOnKief on her cell phone. He answers at an outdoor café. She tells him that they're not going to Nevada. He asks her if she's staying at the same hotel. She says they might switch them at the last minute, but either way she'll let him know where she is. "I can still smell your perfume on my skin," says TakeOnKief. She promises to call him.

"Is that the girl?" says TakeOnKief's table companion, who turns out to be none other than ForeignAccentedTerrorBoss. TOK confirms this, and relays the news that the Palmers haven't left California. FATB welcomes this news, since it makes it easier for them to get to Palmer, and confirms that TOK has "taken care of Gaines's people." TOK scolds FATB for using the stupid American terrorists in the first place. A beautiful laughing woman at a nearby table distracts them. "She looks like Martina," says FATB. "Our sister's dead," says TOK. "Leave it alone." They resume their discussion. TOK assures FATB that two more men are approaching their "targets" and that Palmer will be dead by the season finale…I mean, "midnight."

Aw! How nice of Nina to pick out such an alluring outfit for Spawn: a powder-blue wraparound sweater that displays her nubile young breasts to perfection. Speaking of failed birth control, Spawn enters the bathroom and asks a freshly showered Bride where she can lay her hands on some toothpaste. Bride shows her where the toothpaste is…right next to the home pregnancy test. Spawn is thrilled about her mom's pregnancy. "Why, I am just so grateful for the love I have received from this family, I can't wait to share it with a sibling!" Oh wait, I'm joking. Spawn freaks out that she wasn't told about this before. Bride acts like Spawn actually has a legitimate beef, and tries to "explain." Spawn storms out of the room. Bride tells her to stop being so selfish. Uh, Bride? You know that whole "I had sex with Eli to save your cherry" guilt trip that you've been restraining yourself from using? It's time to whip it out -- just saying. Spawn apologizes. Bride slams the bathroom door on her. Good! The time is 2:26:35 PM.

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