4:00 PM – 5:00 PM

Episode Report Card
Gustave: B | Grade It Now!
Amnesia and other personality disorders

The time is 4:54:45 PM. Klockwise from the top left, paramedics rush to save LittleTerrorBrother from the jaws of death, Nina watches on the KieferKam, and Spawn's cab arrives at Rick's house. Spawn tells the driver to wait while she gets out and knocks on the front door. Single-Shouldered Fatigue Tube Top Skank answers the door. Jeez, you'd think if you were Rick and you didn't want your various girlfriends to have ugly confrontations, you'd keep your ear cocked for the front doorbell. Fortunately, Rick shows up just as things are getting slightly ugly. He explains that Spawn is there because of something involving Evil Frat Boy #2 and last night. "You said you cut your arm on a fence," says SkankofRick. Spawn convinces SkankofRick that she just wants to go through Dan's room to find some information…and borrow some cab fare. Rick pays the driver while SkankofRick gives Spawn the evil eye from across the porch.

The time is 4:57:18 PM. Bride has fallen asleep at the banquette of the Venus Flytrap Café. A man -- think Michael Gross from Family Ties, but with sexier eyes -- enters with a leather briefcase and wakes her up. "You don't remember me?" he says. "Phil?" she says. How did she know his name was Phil? "Are you my doctor?" asks Bride. "No, not exactly," chuckles Dr. Phil. Mr. Martin enters, and Dr. Phil thanks him for calling him. Bride reluctantly accepts their offer of some water. Dr. Phil promises that he's going to make Bride of Kiefer all better as soon as he gets to the bottom of everything.

Back at the Palmer Suite, Kiefer paces around in a bloodstained shirt, getting chewed out by Xander Berkeley over the phone for going ahead with such a reckless plan, and tells Xander that LTB has a fifty-fifty chance of surviving Faux-licity's Dance of the Seven Veils. "What am I going to tell district?" sighs Xander. Kiefer tells Xander to keep district off his back while he figures out his next move.

Palmer enters. He's furious to find out that the plan backfired, and that now his precious Faux-licity is in custody. "She broke from the plan," kounters Kiefer. "She attacked him." Palmer runs over to the room where Faux-licity is being questioned by Nina as she wipes TerrorBlood off her hands with a washcloth. "I'm so sorry," she sobs helplessly. "I don't know what happened!" Palmer tells Faux-licity not to cooperate without a lawyer present. Kiefer tells Palmer that he's not helping matters by interfering like this. Somewhere in the midst of this chaos, a lone cell phone rings. It's LittleTerrorBrother's cell phone. Nina and Kiefer contemplate what to do. Kiefer decides to risk it and answer. "D'ya have the money?" says the voice on the other end. Kiefer plays along and arranges to meet up with this mystery TerrorAssociate somewhere downtown. "I'll be wearing a red baseball cap," say the lips of the goateed TerrorAssociate. Kiefer hangs up, and Nina looks at him like he's crazy. The time is 4:59:58…4:59:59…5:00:00 PM.

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