Day 3: 5:00 PM – 6:00 PM

Episode Report Card
Gustave: B- | Grade It Now!
Find Kyle Singer!

The time is 05:43:16 PM. Klockwise from the top left, the debate continues, Potato Face goes through the Kiefer Kube, and Bitchelle frets over Soul Patch some more. In the Kiefer Kube, Potato Face has been going through Kiefer's papers, but hasn't found anything. She starts to dig through his trash and finds a telltale amber vial. "My God," she says to herself. She gets on the phone and asks for someone from "the drug unit" to come down.

Back at the debate, Ruby Keeler wants to talk character. He refers to the "allegations and indictments surrounding the President's former wife." Yeah, it's about time that someone mentioned that the Commander in Chief was once married to someone who almost got L.A. dusted off the map. That's kind of a big deal, now that I think about it. "Most people have operated under the assumption that the President wouldn't repeat his history of associating with persons of questionable character," continues Ruby Keeler, who then proceeds to announce that his office has just learned about Dr. Anne's medical scam. A medical scam, incidentally, that may have led the deaths of three innocent people. (Yeah, but what were their names? They've got to have names!) Now am I high, or am I the only person watching who is thinking that if Palmer's first wife was responsible for bringing a nuclear bomb into the country, and his latest girlfriend might have been involved in a white collar crime, that Palmer's taste in women is improving? I mean, "progress not perfection," right? Palmer interrupts and scolds him for "launching a personal attack on a private citizen." Ruby Keeler continues to make parallels between Palmer's character and his competence as leader of the free world. Finally it's Palmer's turn for a rebuttal, and he announces that Ruby Keeler's accusations are false and he's merely making personal attacks to avoid the real issues at stake. Meanwhile, backstage, Dr. Anne is totally freaked out. "Now do you get it?" asks Brother Palmer. Get what?

Back at CTU, the guy from the drug unit does his thing with some Q-tips and something that looks like a 1980s home pregnancy test, then informs Potato Face that the test was "positive." Potato Face's face twitches for a few moments. Then she concludes that she's got to "tell Bitchelle." Drug Guy packs up his case and leaves just as Spawn walks by. "What are you doing in my dad's office?" asks Spawn. Potato Face answers that she was going through Kiefer's things per Bitchelle's request in order to piece together his reasons for starting that prison riot. Spawn asks Potato Face something about the Whatever Technology and whether their system problems have anything to do with a line surge. Potato Face explains that it's not possible for a line surge to cause said system problems. "Why?" asks Potato Face. "It's probably nothing," says Spawn, getting ready to go downstairs. All of a sudden she hesitates. "Did you find anything?" she asks, referring to Potato Face's search. "I can't talk about this," says Potato Face briskly. Spawn offers to help her, but Potato Face rejects her offer and asks her to leave. "What's in the box?" asks Spawn, referring to a box of evidence that Potato Face has gathered. "This is really inappropriate behavior, Spawn," says Potato Face. They get into a pointless discussion of "field op regulations" and "jurisdictional prerogatives." Spawn refuses to leave until she knows what Potato Face has on Kiefer. "I think your dad's been using drugs," says Potato Face, always the tactful one. She produces, for Spawn's benefit, Kiefer's tourniquets and syringes, and informs her of the positive test for opiates. "And he's been acting really weird, okay?" she says. Jeez, looks like Potato Face could use a fix herself.

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