24
Day 4: 9:00 AM – 10:00 AM

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M. Giant: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Kiefer to the Rescue! Um, Kiefer?

Curtis's cell-phone rings. It's Aisha Tyler, calling from behind some French doors in a sunny garden somewhere. She wants to know why she hasn't been included in the ongoing employee-exchange program between CTU and the Las Vegas Crime Lab. Curtis tries to blow her off, but she persists until he tells her that he's uncomfortable working with her since he realized that he was shtupping him to further her career. Curtis starts to get seriously pissed off as she decides that she'll talk to Driscoll instead. Then, before she hangs up on him, she punches a code into her phone that causes Curtis's handset to instantly microwave his brain.

The Kiefmobile. Kiefer calls Potato Face's desk. She wants to know what happened with Witless. Kiefer explains. Potato Face tells Kiefer about how Driscoll says he's defying orders. Kiefer says he didn't have a choice. He even repeats Potato Face's words back to her: "She's not handling this the right way." Potato Face warns, "If anything happens to Witless…" I'm really interested in how she would have finished that sentence. What could she do to him that's worse than hanging out with him socially? ["Put him in a Winona Ryder vehicle? …Oh, wait." -- Sars] But Kiefer cuts her off to say he's doing the best he can and that his priority is to find the terrorists. Potato Face asks why he's calling her, then. Now that Kiefer finally has control over the conversation, he explains that VVH is heading to the canyons and he'll need satellite surveillance. Otherwise VVH will realize that he's being followed on the isolated road. Potato Face rolls her eyes. "You want me to steal satellite bandwidth from CTU without anyone knowing?" "Yes," Kiefer says. "Where are you?" Potato Face says. Whoa, awesome! Who is this woman and what has she done with Potato Face? Kiefer gives her his location. Potato Face looks at her screen and tells Kiefer that traffic cameras will serve well enough for now, but they will need satellite coverage later. He asks her to call back, and she agrees. When she hangs up, Lispy Skip is looming over her. "Who was that?" he asks. "It was personal," Potato Face snits. Lispy Skip lumbers off. Nosy bastard. I swear, CTU must have nosiness as a main criteria for employment. Everyone has to take a nosiness quiz that rates them somewhere from zero to Jamie Farr, and nobody who scores under Joe Namath gets hired.

As he returns to his desk, Special Agent Breck asks him if something's wrong. Lispy Skip says Potato Face is acting strange. If by "strange" you mean "helpful," which, okay. Special Agent Breck pretends not to be concerned, but turns to give Potato Face a suspicious stare. She should just call Potato Face on the videophone and ask to be put on hold.

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