Day 5: 8:00 PM – 9:00 PM

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now!
Spy vs. Spy

8:40:54. The Veep is in a private office, intimidating the governor of California. Of course, he's only talking on the phone, and we can't hear the other end of the conversation, but it's still hilarious. Just imagine a deep voice with an Austrian accent meekly saying, "Yes, Mistuh Vice-Pwesident." As the Veep finally gets his way and then acts all smarmy about it, an aide knocks on the door and says that Wayne Palmer is trying to get through one of the local roadblocks on his way to Not Camp David. So much for keeping his meeting with Aaron secret. "What should I tell the roadblock, sir?" the aide asks. Gardner has himself a good think, and you can totally see the gears in Ray Wise's head turning as he muses, "What the hell is my agenda re Wayne, anyway? Nobody's told me that yet."

Wayne is pulled over in his car, grumpily telling a roadblock guy to call ahead for him and get clearance. But the Captain is going on about chain of command, so Wayne demands to know "who's in charge of the military's role in this?" Just then, the Army captain's cell phone rings, and he waves Wayne through. Wayne swallows the head of righteously angry steam he's built up and drives on at 8:42:20. Too bad he didn't get to find out that the Vice-President has appointed himself Commander-in-Chief.

Van Nuys airport. Theo is sitting behind the wheel of his car in the parking lot, Kiefer lying down out of sight in the back seat. Theo manages to resist the powerful telepathic waves from viewers trying to convince him to climb into the rear. So to speak. Curtis and his guys are setting up in one of the airport hangars, and Kiefer reminds everyone not to move in until he confirms Collette's identity. Theo says that's a good idea, given Collette's cautious nature. "What'll happen to her?" he asks Kiefer, who says he doesn't know yet, and naïvely wonders why Theo's asking. Instead of answering, Theo asks Kiefer whether he's been in his situation: undercover for long periods and involved with a woman during that time. Wait, there's another kind of being undercover? Because I thought that's why they called it that. Kiefer looks a bit disarmed as he tries to remember Clowdy-ah's name. "There's no question we're doing what has to be done for our countries," Theo says. "But sometimes it's harder than others." And that's why international spies now get a cyanide pill and Viagra.

Back at CTU, Buchanan calls Chloe into an impromptu little meeting in the Situation Room. Alarm bells go off in her head as she sees that the only people there are herself, Buchanan, Hayes, and, darting in behind her, Slime. He's once again all dressed up with nowhere to go but my last nerve. Hayes and Slime accuse Chloe of having downloaded something and sent it to Kiefer's PDA, like, way to cover your tracks there, lady. She starts to play dumb, but Buchanan warns her not to make him call NSA and have them run a backtrace. So Chloe rolls over and says that she gave Kiefer the WET list. "What?!" Hayes wails in shock. "No, WET, it's entirely different," Chloe doesn't say. Instead, she tells her shocked superiors that they needed it to get to Collette Stenger. Everyone in the room is mad at Chloe, yelling at her until she defensively says, "Jack needed it, okay?" Buchanan yells back that it's not okay, and Hayes takes this moment to pounce on him: "And you expected us to give your agents a chance?" Buchanan shuts the hell up as Hayes snaps, "Get me Bauer."

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