The Girl Next Door

Episode Report Card
admin: C- | Grade It Now!
It's a Little Funny

A few minutes later, the MattRents show up to get pictures and video of this important teen ritual, to find the moment already being captured by the AV club while Klitz wears a couple of porn stars over his tux. The MattRents don't seem entirely approving, and I don't blame them; Ferrari doesn't really match Klitz's boutonniere. MattMom asks Eli if "those girls go to your school." Eli's answer? "Ah, actually, no…They're porn stars." The MattRents chuckle. Oh, that Eli. He's such a card when he steals from Grosse Pointe Blank.

In the back of the limo, Klitz interrupts the awkward silence to observe that April looks really nice. Ferrari agrees. And then April and Ferrari start making out. I'm not making this up. Eli and Klitz drool while Matt looks at Spawn all, "Did you arrange this? 'Cause if so, hey, nice gesture."

They roll up to the school and make the kind of head-turning entrance one would expect when walking into the gym while equipped with three porn stars. The math teacher wants to know what the cameras are for, and Matt explains that it's for the yearbook. If that's true, this plan sucks. Also, I don't know why Matt feels the need to make excuses to a teacher who allowed him to get kidnapped clean out of his class the other day. Anyway. Eli makes his escape to "go set up" with Klitz and their dates, while Matt plans to approach the "actors" -- namely, the popular kids. He and Spawn have barely gotten themselves punch when Jocks #1-3 approach him first. They ask to talk to Matt, and Spawn excuses herself with a very long kiss. Matt sits back complacently in his chair, hands behind his head, and asks, "What's up?" Well, Matt, the jocks want to know if those girls are porn stars. "Yeah," Matt deadpans. The jocks nearly lose their tuxedo rental deposits on the spot. They want to meet Matt's dates. Matt leans forward for the kill: "How would you guys like to be in a movie?"

The next thing we see, Matt's leading Jocks #1-3 down a stairwell while instructing them to sign the release forms he's given them. They're paging through their scripts at the same time, and Jock #2 drops his release form on the floor. The little party arrives at the computer lab, where Klitz is guarding the door. Matt only allows in Jocks #1 and #3, telling #2, "Sorry, bro. The party's full." Revenge is sweet. Could be a little nuttier, though. Klitz lets them into the computer lab, where April and Ferrari are demurely naked and taking dopey direction from Eli. Hey, I think I'm starting to get a sense of what kind of movie they're working on here.

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