30 Rock. Lemon moans to Jack that she just got her bridesmaid dress for Cerie's wedding. Apparently Cerie has instituted a built-in weight limit by ordering the dresses in Vietnamese size 2. Lemon vows to beat the dress at its own game and has joined a support group -- or, as Jack calls it, "a suicide cult." Speaking of death, Jack says he got a call from Don Geiss's estate lawyer because Jack's in Geiss's will. Jack is excited at the prospect of having a piece of Geiss's legacy. Lemon is, too, but mainly for the "only on TV" home hospital equipment. Credits.
Studio. Tracy announces Grizz's impending nuptials. Assuming it'll be him, Tracy urges Grizz to announce whom he's chosen as his best man. Grizz says he hasn't chosen yet. Tracy does not take this well and walks off sulking.
Lemon moves on to fret about telling Jenna they can't run a Kardashian-themed skit she's pitched (apparently Jack is BFF with Lamar Odom). When Lemon breaks the news to Jenna, the diva herself is surprisingly cool about it. Then she asks how Pete's son with the broken arm is doing. Lemon immediately knows something is amiss and asks, "Are you soaking your tampons in vodka again?" Jenna spills that she met a guy who's made her really happy. Pete foolishly thinks Jenna's new romance might lighten the load for them a bit, but Lemon knows better than that. She reminds him of Jenna's crazy relationships (and crazier boyfriends, including but not limited to a sniper). She says they've got to put the breaks on this courtship or, like all the others, it'll end up biting them in the ass. Or, in Pete's case, the stomach.
Geiss's will reading. Everyone's in attendance: Cathy, Mrs. Geiss, the mistress, Jack, the secret Canadian family, the secret attic family, et al. Cathy inherits an heirloom pocket watch that she has already destroyed by plunking it in her mouth. And, the moment we've all been waiting for: Jack inherits Geiss's beloved pet peacock Argus. And boy is he a beaut. Jack nearly wells up with the sentiment of it all.
30 Rock. Grizz interrupts as Lemon tries to pour herself into the bridesmaid dress. He says he hopes his engagement isn't too awkward given their "sexual past," then asks Lemon to break the news to Tracy that Grizz has tapped Dot Com to be his best man. Grizz appreciates how in sync they are, saying "We really were the Sam and Diane of this place!"