Lemon's office. Lemon and Pete are having a last-minute meeting before their just-for-show TGS auditions with Jack. You see, they've already picked the guy they want to be the new cast member: Jayden Michael Tyler. Lemon had to endure "eight cities, 40 comics, one slap fight with a TSA agent" to get this close, so she'll be damned if Jack goes rogue and picks someone else. As insurance, they've stacked the deck in their pick's favor. His competition? A middle-aged female comic with a bolo tie, a one-man band who only plays Halloween music, and "Australia's Jackie Mason." Lemon regrets crushing so many others' dreams, having experienced her share of rejection as an auditioning comic actress. Pete assures her that at least she is "making this guy's dreams come true," He adds, "At your age, it's probably the last time you'll ever make a man happy."
Jack pops in just in time to laugh at Lemon's advancing age. He asks where they are on the talent search, so they pull the wool over his eyes about the strong contenders they have lined up for him to see that afternoon. Jack already doesn't like the look of some of them. Lemon reminds him that these are real people with hopes and dreams, but he doesn't want to hear it. He delivers a speech -- scratching all over his body throughout, but more on that later -- about being dispassionate and robotic. He concludes that human empathy is "as useless as the Winter Olympics... this February on NBC." Credits.
Out in the corridor, Jenna skitters up to Tracy in a tizzy. She asks if it's true that Lemon is holding auditions that day. Tracy doesn't think they have anything to worry about because the higher-ups will just hire some white guy who won't displace their bits. Jenna remains paranoid, and Dot Com chips in that it's true that anything can happen in the audition process. Tracy smugs that Dot Com must know everything about theater since he played a bird in a play one time. The bird in question? Trigorin in Chekhov's The Seagull.
Jenna spots Kenneth and heads over (floating with the wind in her hair like a witch, no less) to ferret information out of him. He admits he's under explicit orders from Lemon not to reveal any information about the auditions to Jenna. Then he remembers there's also a Jenna at the luggage store downstairs, so it must be okay to tell TGS Jenna. Since she's not hopelessly neurotic, nosy, and stopping-at-nothing to remain in the spotlight. Nope, must be that luggage store Jenna. Ohhhhhh, Kenneth. She sees the audition list and freaks out.