After the meeting in Washington, Jack passes along some of the assertive wisdom of Don Geiss to Cooter. Cooter is over the moon now about the prospects of working with and learning from Jack. But Jack gets a phone call. It's Jonathan with surprising news. Geiss spoke. Wait spoke or spake? Spake? Geiss Spokane, Washingtoned. How's that? Anyway Geiss isn't out of his coma but he did manage to mutter the words "Jacky boy." Later Jack goes to Cooter in the office as he tapes the words Pen Closet on the door and hands him a letter of resignation. Cooter is taken aback and he denies the resignation. Jack says he can't do that but as acting head of about three different acronyms Cooter begs to differ. Jack begs him to be let go but it's out of Cooter's hands. Even Cooter's boss doesn't want anyone else leaving the administration in its waning moments. New boxes of pens arrive and Cooter starts the chant "U.S.A.! U.S.A.!"
Lemon finds Jenna in her dressing room and hugs her from behind. "Oh my God you're pregnant." Lemon spills her secret. The mystery semen donor... it's Duffy! She took him upstairs after a few too many margaritas but before he tried to throw her off the subway platform. In a flashback we see Lemon ask him upstairs to fix a light and Duffy turns around to the camera with his best look since Oz.
"How could you have slept with Dennis?" puzzles Jenna. Lemon doesn't pause long to regret it. She's ready to take on single motherhood, "like Erin Brockovich or Sarah Connor. Another Terminator reference thanks to Dean Winters. I smell a crossover.
Jack tries to reason with Cooter to let him go. "Haven't you ever thought of leaving?" Cooter has in fact, every day for the past two years or since the Roseanne, Tom Arnold, Jenna sex tape rumors. But he stuck with it and now he's got pens. "Glorious pens!" Cooter opens the pen box. It's full of pen caps without any pens. He starts to lose it. This guy even loses it like Matthew Broderick would, meaning he doesn't really have the range to lose it. I'll have to look up this actor's name at my local library. How long before the public library get cast information from television networks? Never mind, I'll find out that answer on the Internet. "AskJeeves" as my mother says. Cooter Burger isn't really Cooter's name. It's James Riley. The President gave him that nickname -- actually two nicknames -- because he looks like a turtle and ate a hamburger in front of him. "It wasn't even a hamburger. It was a sandwich." Jack and James agree to work together to get fired.