30 Rock

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: C | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
The Pelican Grief

Lemon: You're going to try to have sex with Jack?
Sheryl: I have 15 employees. I'm responsible for them. Do you have any idea what that's like?
Lemon: Well, yeah. I have 200 people under me, but...
Sheryl: Wow! Maybe we could team up, go in there together, lez out, give him a show...
Lemon: No, Sheryl. Get a grip!

CSI: TGS
Tracy: Jenna, something weird is going on.
Jenna: You mean this budget cut? Don't worry about it, Tracy. It's just going to affect the 'non-specials.'
Tracy: No, it's not that. Jenna, you're the smartest person I know. Do you think Kenneth could be a murderer?
Jenna: What? Why would you think that?
Tracy: Well, I might be crazy... but neither he nor his bird would let me into his bedroom. And why wouldn't you want to let Tracy Jordan into your bedroom unless you got a buncha dead nurses in there?
Jenna: Well I had to study serial killers to prepare for my role as criminal profiler Jill St. Ferrari in the Lifetime original miniseries Hushed Rapings, and all mass murderers share three characteristics: Cruelty to animals...
Tracy: He grew up killin' pigs!
Jenna: ...Bed wetting...
Tracy: No wonder he's fascinated when I do that!
Jenna: ...And an inability to read human facial cues.
Tracy: I admonished him for that earlier! Three for three! He's a monstah!
Jenna: We've gotta go tell Jack! If Kenneth is actually a killer, we're gonna be heroes!

Lemon's Tools of Seduction
Lemon: Lee! I need that dress Jenna wore for the hooker sketch, the heels Tracy wears when he plays Michelle Obama, and double -- no, triple Spanx. I need a makeup artist! [A makeup artist emerges.] No! The sluttier one.

The Closer
Lemon: Thanks for dinner. You sure know a lot about sushi.
Brad: Well, you gotta be careful. They try to up-sell you real crab. Listen, I gotta get going. I gotta lot of work tomorrow.
Lemon: All right, listen, we're both adults here. We know the deal. Let's cut to the chase.
Brad: That's certainly direct.
Lemon: We go upstairs, 20 minutes, open mouth, I will work your ears.
Brad: I don't know, Liz. What you're asking to do is a big deal. If I go through with this, I need to know that it's worth it.
Lemon: Fine. Thirty minutes, I'll make some sounds, and you can say one weird thing to me.
Brad considers silently, skeptically

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7Next

30 Rock

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP