Dr. Spaceman's office. The good doctor finishes up his "Lasig" treatment on Lemon and asks her to read the top line of a piece of paper across the room from them. She does: "Dear Dr. Spaceman, Thank you for your submission. The New England Journal of Medicine does not publish X-rated cartoons." Dr. Spaceman runs down her options for impulse treatments (face burn, bone morph, mouth peel), but Lemon tells him she can't do anything rash, looks-wise, since she is going to be on TV that week. Responds Dr. Spaceman, "Really? I think you mean radio." This unnerves Lemon, after Jack's little ants-in-the-pants dance earlier. Dr. Spaceman offers her something for her nerves, then remembers he's not allowed to have sex with his patients. He looks at her appraisingly once more and notes that her hair is... fine.
Back in the writers' room, the guys invite Frank out to Chuck E. Cheese for Divorced Hispanic Moms Night. He's too busy, with sketches to read and meetings to attend. Toofer shoots him a sideways glance and says, "Okay. Have a good night... Liz!" Frank shouts out that he's not Lemon, then delights in finding a delicious piece of ham under a script.
Over in Tracy's dressing room, Tracy listens intently and Kenneth takes notes as Grizz and Dot Com crunch the data on all past EGOT winners. Many of them have one thing in common -- composing a hit song. They all ascertain that Tracy will get his baby girl if he writes a really great song that inspires a TV show, which furthermore inspires a film and can then be adapted into a Broadway play. Tracy resolves to write the most popular song of all time.
The next day, Lemon returns to the studio sporting a truly awful haircut (think '70s era Shelley Duvall with Real Housewife wings on the side and bangs cut by a two-year-old), not to mention a newfound insecurity about the way she says the word "camer-AH." As Lemon goes to change, Jack flips and runs to Jenna's room to tell her he has an actress problem. "Okay," she says, "Don't try to move the body yourself." Jack clarifies that the actress in question is Lemon, and she's gone to a zany place after he told her that she shouldn't wear her glasses yesterday. Jenna tells him that being on camer-AH makes performers vulnerable. Jack doesn't understand, because it's Lemon they're talking about. Jenna explains that Jack has created two Lemons: Regular Lemon and Performer Lemon. She advises him to "lie to her, coddle her, protect her from the real world." Says Jack, "I get it. Treat her like the New York Times treats its readers!"