Down the hall, Tracy is recording the most amazing song ever and has enlisted the help of everyone under the sun -- including, but not limited to, a mariachi band, Jenna scatting, Kenneth on cowbell, a four-piece jazz band, a DJ, a string quartet, and, I do believe, Tina Fey's husband on keyboards. Needless to say, it's effing horrible. To Tracy's credit, he realizes this. He marvels, "How can five of the most popular musical styles, all played at once, sound so bad?" He decides to seek guidance from a fellow EGOT-er. As he starts off, an even more Lemon-ized Frank stomps up with a hand on his hip to tell Tracy he's supposed to be at a fitting. Frank quickly realizes his condition has only gotten worse and shouts, "Nerds!" Tracy thinks aloud, "Is it me, or is Liz Lemon getting hotter?"

Over by Lemon's makeshift dressing room, Jack tries to talk his latest whacked-out starlet (that'd be Lemon) down from the ledge. She says she doesn't want to do the show anymore. He refuses her request.

Across town, Tracy consults EGOT-ress Whoopi Goldberg, who reveals that she got her EGOT on a bet, too. She won, forcing Arlen Specter to change parties, thereby creating the Supermajority. It happens, I guess. Tracy wonders why it's so hard to EGOT when he's paying all these people to do it for him. Whoopi tells him he can only EGOT with projects he believes in. Then Tracy notices Whoopi's Emmy is for Daytime. She says it still counts and advises him that awards will come if he does things from the heart. He asks her for a glass of water, then takes the chance to start snatching statuettes. But an EGOT-ress cannot be fooled. Whoopi catches him before he successfully absconds.

Back at the studio, it's Jenna to the rescue. Jack pleads with her to help him since she's the only one who knows where Lemon is coming from. Though she's unhappy to reveal a diva takedown maneuver, Jenna says she's always wondered why they didn't just take the door off its hinges. So off the door goes. Jack tells Lemon that she is bringing down the ship (not to mention exposing her entire audience to Kenneth's sanitized renditions of Garrison Keillor stories). He tells Regular Lemon to take a backseat to Performer Lemon for just a moment, so he can make some money. Lemon turns to the mirror to coax Performer Lemon out on stage. What follows is a scene strongly inspired by The Exorcist, but with more ham. Right after Performer Lemon tells Regular Lemon to kill herself, Regular Lemon turns around and starts crying -- from her mouth. Apparently that's a side effect of the Lasig. Jack decides he has to fall on the sword and tells Lemon to go home. Regular Lemon doesn't want to let him down, but Performer Lemon growls her into submission.