30 Rock

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: B+ | 1385 USERS: B-
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Prenuptial Disagreements

Bait & Twitch
Tracy: What's this?
Dot Com: Hard to Watch: Based on the Book Stone Cold Bummer by Manipulate. It's about growing up in our old neighborhood.
Kenneth: And it's real Oscar bait, sir. You say things like, "You don't know my pain!" and "You watch your mouth, Tyrese!" and, in a less dramatic scene, "I'll have hash browns."
Tracy: Interesting... And I've gotta win a Oscar somehow! It's this or I submit that animated film I drew about the Holocaust.

Another Glimpse into Kenneth's Storied Past
Tracy: I read the script.
Kenneth: And? Did you like it?
Tracy: I hated it! I couldn't relate.
Dot Com: What? It's about growing up poor in the South Bronx, moving from foster home to foster home, seeing a pigeon fight a baby! All of that happened to you.
Tracy: I don't remember any of that stuff. I mean, I remember being born, of course. I remember learning how to ride a bike -- but that was last year. From '75 to '82 is just a blur.
Dot Com: Then you're repressing some stuff.
Kenneth: That can happen. I remember the summer my Weebiloos group went camping, and we were taken by the hill people. Next thing I knew, summer was over, and it was time for back-to-school shopping!

Tubas & Turmeric
Jack: How was your dinner?
Nancy: I'm stuffed, that place was good! Way better than the Indian joint I go to in Boston -- O'Doyle's.
Jack: You know what I like after too much curry? A warm glass of milk and some John Philip Sousa marches.

Olympic Game
Lemon: I've been through every guy. There's no one left
Jenna: Come on, you sound like me at the Olympic Village.
Lemon: Ugh, so what if I go to Floyd's wedding alone? Maybe I'll just lean into it and bring a cat in a baby stroller.

And Now for a Glimpse into Tracy's Storied Past
Tracy: It's all coming back to me. Oh my God! I slept on an old dog bed stuffed with wigs! I watched a prostitute stab a clown! Our basketball hoop was a rib cage -- a rib cage! Why did you bring me here? I blocked all this stuff out for a reason! Oh, Lord, some guy with dreads electrocuted my fish!
And later...
Tracy: All my life I've tried to forget the things I've seen -- a crackhead breastfeeding a rat, a homeless man licking a Hot Pocket off the third rail of the G train!
And still later...
Tracy: I've seen a blind guy bite a police horse! A puppy committed suicide after he saw our bathroom! I once bit into a burrito and there was a child's shoe in it! I've seen a hooker eat a tire! A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy's! The sewer people stole my skateboard! The projects I lived in were named after Zachary Taylor, generally considered to be one of the worst presidents of all time! I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo! They were very drunk!

30 Rock

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