30 Rock

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: B | 3 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Lizbianism

Lemon: Jenna, the only way you make things happen in the real world is by taking action.
Jenna: Oh, I've taken Action. It dries your mouth up, but the sex is amazing.

Jack Probably Would Have Preferred Lemonomics
Lemon: Great news, Jack. I've got a new life philosophy that I call "Lizbianism."
Jack: I see. How did you come up with that name?
Lemon: Well, I'm Liz, and obviously my philosophy is simple, like a bean. I'm fixing problems in my personal life the way that I fix problems at work. I saved the show, and now I'm going to save me. Because Lizbianism means that I am a dyke... against the rising waters of mediocrity.

JessupGate Just Doesn't Have the Same Ring
Lemon: You have to call President Clinton. He got Lisa Ling's sister out of North Korea.
Jack: President InterBush is out of the question. Avery will never accept his help. She can't forgive him for not hitting on her during the 1996 Democratic Convention.
Lemon: She's much too thin.

iShave
Jack: Avery?
Avery: Jack! Oh thank God. I forgot the US country code, but then I remembered it's number one!
Jack: How are you calling me?
Avery: Nobody here has ever seen an iPhone. I told them it was my razor. I have to shave my legs with it, but there's an app for that.
Jack: Oh, Avery, I'm sorry. This is all my fault. I told you to stay.
Avery: No, this is nobody's fault -- except for maybe that pansy Harry Truman for not taking down this country when he had the chance.
Jack: Truman!

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6

30 Rock

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP