Over in Lemon's office, she calls Floyd. He says he's in New York for a few days and wants to catch up so she can check out the Chola eyebrows he's grown. She can't meet up with him that night, but they make a date for the next night, and it looks promising.
Jack's office. Danny rushes in, mortified about all the quotes falsely attributed to him in his Times profile. Jack quickly ascertains that it's a prank -- his big tip-off being that the paper doesn't have any reporters named Seymour Nips. He guesses it's the work of "Frank, the black one and Lutz." They dub themselves The Silver Panthers, vow not to let this slight stand, and begin plotting their revenge.
Downstairs, Lemon shares with the writers that Floyd called, and she's actually a little excited about the possibilities. (She also drops in that Floyd used to be an alcoholic -- more on that later -- a coincidence since Frank's hat says "Sort of Loaded".) But her happiness is short-lived when she sees Floyd and his bride-to-be on TV. They're finalists in a Today show contest to have their wedding on the show. The happy couple share a kiss. Lemon does a verbal spit take.
Down the hall, Kenneth regales plaster-paralyzed Tracy and Jenna with his stories. See below.
Lemon's office. Forlorn Lemon watches a montage of Floyd and his fiancée romping about New York. Jack comes in to ask for her "weakness files" on Frank, Toofer and Lutz. Lemon mock-chipperly announces Floyd's engagement. Even Jack, who firmly believes in "Bs before Hs," says Floyd keeping her in the dark on this info was pretty low. Lemon starts to break up about how her love with Floyd didn't turn into an '80s movie with a sweeping Christopher Cross song playing them out as the sun set. She actually starts singing the song she had in mind, but Jack snaps her out of by reminding her that things didn't work out for him with Nancy, either. Of course, this topic quickly turns into a pity party for Jack, too, which is only broken up when Lemon hears Floyd screaming his love for his future wife through her open window. She freaks out and yells down at him to shut the eff up, tagging on a very subtle, "This isn't Liz!"
She returns to her conversation with Jack, declaring that Floyd cannot win the competition. He urges her not to pursue revenge and to "stick to the high road because the low road is a slippery slope." She agrees that it's just like TV, where you once couldn't say "crap" but now everything from "asswipe" to "anal rot" (Jack's offering) is allowed. She says she's going to meet him tomorrow night for dinner and ask him, as a friend, not to get married in her proverbial backyard. Jack notes that she's gotten food poisoning from the fish at the restaurant where she's taking Floyd three times. Coincidence or Lemonspiracy? As he walks away, Jack warns Lemon that, with these tactics, she'll never be a Silver Panther. "I don't care," she shouts. "I'll start my own group. Rejection from society is what created the X-Men!" Now, now, Lemon. Do we really want to be aligning ourselves with mutants?