Jenna resumes filming, only now there's a "Visit Connecticut" poster on the wall behind her, the latest murder victim is wearing a UConn Huskies T-shirt, and the blood splatter on the wall now reads, "www.IHeartConnecticut.com." Slaughterface enters the room, revealing a Yale banner and a postcard-style Connecticut poster behind him. He tells her ominously, "No one's coming to save you... because we're deep inside one of Connecticut's 30 beautiful state forests. Thirty!" Jenna begs, "Oh please, don't kill me. I still haven't tried the famous seafood pizza at Sally's in New Haven!" The director yells cut and tells them to move on to the scene where Slaughterface Santa beats Jenna to the docent to the Danbury Railway Museum. Jack busts in, telling them to hold off because he's just convinced Wal-Mart to sponsor the movie, as long as it is a family-friendly, wholesome production. He tells them the production will be profitable and calls Jenna to her dressing room to continue writing.
Down in the studio, Pete calls Reggie aside. He tells him he knows what it's like for your kids to think you're a loser. He offers to throw the arm wrestling match to save Reggie some face. "You know what your wife told me in the shower this morning?" Reggie asks. "You're a good guy!"
Elsewhere, Kenneth has fallen asleep waiting for Tracy's call. The computer finally buzzes with an incoming Skype. Lemon warns Kenneth to act completely natural so they can hold Tracy on the line as long as possible. Kenneth immediately freaks out and starts speaking in a quasi-Australian accent with lots of strange dips in his cadence. Tracy senses something is wrong... with Jeremy. Lemon hops into view and tells Tracy not to hang up. "Uh-oh! Jeremy, call me when you're alone," he tells the lizard before hanging up. Kenneth apologizes to Lemon for screwing up their one shot, but she's satisfied because she now knows where Tracy is.
Stamford. Slaughterface walks into the scene with a Santa hat on, saying, "Merry Christmas!" Jenna screams joyfully, "I practice abstinence!" Cut out to a muppet in the shot as they all scream, "Connecticut!" And... cut! Jack returns with Phil Rosenthal, creator of Everybody Loves Raymond, who has offered to pay the production five million dollars so he can pursue his dream of becoming an actor. Jenna looks at him coldly, saying that she never heard back from him about her audition and wondering if he made a decision. He tells her, "Yeah, 15 years ago. We went with Doris Roberts. But thank you for tying your headshot around a brick and throwing it through my window."









Comments