30 Rock

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: C | Grade It Now!
One-Hit Blunders

Jack's house. Jack writes his check to the nanny, Sherry, and apologies, saying, "I hope there was enough shark meat in the refrigerator for your sandwiches." She shrugs. He looks over the check again and realizes that he's paying her the same rate he was paying her when she was working full-time. She tells him that it's her only rate. He tries to negotiate with her, but she just pulls out a clementine and eats it silently while he jabbers on in some failed economic metaphor. He tells her the rate's unreasonable. She looks at him blankly and asks, "So... whatcha wan' do?" He shrinks back from her bold tactics and ends up giving her the full amount anyway.

Lemon's office. She watches Murder on the Orient Express as she replaces a picture of herself with Carol with one of her and Emily Dickinson. Jenna barges in to put a stop to the madness. Lemon notices that Jenna is talking especially quickly. Jenna tells her, "I've been taking these new Czechoslovakian organ-slimming pills. They contain a little bit of meth, which is something my body needs anyway!" Jenna tells Lemon they're going out that night because Lemon needs to rebound... sexually. While Jenna likes the wordplay of rebounding with an NBA player, Lemon's free to pick her own booty call. Lemon politely rejects Jenna offer because she has to spend the night editing a "Best of Tracy Jordan" show. Jenna vows, "I'm not giving up. I didn't give up when Eric Roberts abandoned me in the desert, and I won't now." Pause and horrified look from Lemon. "No judgment, Liz. Mr. Roberts thought I was dead."

Lemon finds Pete and Frank jamming out in a sound booth as they record their song about what Pete calls "that delicious little mystery called life." Lemon tells him to come with her to the editing room, but he wants to keep living the rock 'n' roll life. That is, until his arthritis kicks in. Lemon tells him she has some pain pills in her fanny pack, which is in the mini-fridge in her office, then tells him to come straight up to editing. After she leaves, Frank notices that their song is credited to "Hornberger and Rossitano." Pete explains that it's alphabetical, but Frank thinks he should get more credit since he coined the "It's never too late" part of their song. Pete angrily tells him, "When we get up at the Grammys, I talk. Not you!"

Edit room. Lemon picks up a call from Jack, who is beating himself up about bungling the negotiation with Sherry. "If I had done that in a mock negotiation in business school, Professor Widmer would have spanked me in front of the whole class... bare bottom," he chagrins. Lemon tells him that meetings with his nanny have an emotional component that complicates things. Jack compliments her for this keen business insight and tells her Professor Widmer would have given her a "good job spanking." She asks, "What is business school?" Either way, Jack realizes that Sherry has leverage over him -- "eight pounds of screaming, toothless, soft-skulled leverage." He plans to reformulate his negotiating tactics, taking the stance that he hates baby Liddy, so Sherry will have no leverage. Lemon says she could never hate Emily Dickinson. Jack hangs up on her. Lemon wants to resume cutting, but the editor feels nauseated. She thinks it's from her sandwich from American Sub Restaurant Very Clean Come In. She asks Lemon to leave her notes, then runs out in a vomitous frenzy.

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30 Rock




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