30 Rock

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Lady Lola: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Community Organ-izers

Tracy: And you, white kid who's just trying to go unnoticed.
White Kid: Aw, come on!
Tracy: Just be yourself, and I guarantee you every single person in this room will one day be president of the United States! Thank you.
Principal: Tracy, before you go I have a special surprise for you.
Tracy: Okay, but I'm allergic to horses.

Her Book Should Be Called Keepin' It Real with the Deal Breaker Lady
Lemon: Cerie, I'm going out for a couple hours. I'm meeting a book agent about writing a Deal Breaker book. He's going to take me to lunch wherever I want to go. Do you know if there's a sit-down Quizno's in Midtown?

Deal Breaker Breakers
Pete: Liz Lemon, you dumb bitch! Here's the reason I don't want to go on that "family vacation." It's a working farm, and I'm the only one whose hands are big enough to guide the bull during mating.
Lemon: Yeah, well, deal breaker!
Pete: Shut up!
Tracy: There you are, you stupid cracker. You know why I get a hotel room? To poop in peace! No kids bangin' on the door. No phones ringin'. It's my time! Every Tuesday and Thursday at 3pm! I don't know why I only go twice a week. That's what Angie should be worried about!

Drink Milk... Just in Case
Jack: Lemon, how are you?
Lemon: You know what? I'm good. I have a book deal, a free sandwich in my pocket, and I have this weird loose feeling in my shoulders. What is that?
Jack: It's either happiness or osteoporosis. I think it's happiness. You're getting yours.

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30 Rock

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