30 Rock

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Lady Lola: C | Grade It Now!
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Action Pact

Wordsmithing 101 with Tracy Jordan
Pete: Tracy, buddy, will you call Toofer and talk some sense into him?
Tracy: Oh yeah, just ask the black guy 'cause we all know each other. Pete, could you tell a bald eagle to stop scarin' me at zoos? You know, I've been wantin' to say this for a few seconds now -- this workplace has become a hotbed of old-school racism.
Pete: Come on, Tra, no one here is racist.
Tracy: Oh yeah? How come I'm always forced to play ridickerous characters that don'un-anunciate well?

Mmmm... Baby Cows
Avery: I love coming here. You know this is one of the only restaurants in America with a veal tank.
Jack: It just tastes better when you pick your own!

Age Before Beauty
Avery: You know, Jack, I think I know the real reason you were acting weird about doing the red carpet with me.
Jack: Okay?
Avery: You're self-conscious about age difference, and you thought you'd look old standing next to me.
Jack: You're very perceptive.
Avery: I get why it's on your mind, what with your birthday and my amazing skin. And sure, people in this restaurant might think that you're my dad...
Jack: ...or that you're my prostitute?
Avery: Exactly!

Turning Lemons into Women Aid
Pete: Well, well, well, never got a hand-up, huh Liz Lemon?
Lemon: What? Come on, Pete, I'm in a good mood.
Pete: And it's over! While trying to find Toofer's dental records in personnel down on the basement mezzanine, I pulled your file. Elizabeth I-don't-know-how-to-pronounce-your-middle-name Lemon.
Lemon: [Garbled, sounds like "Yahvali."]
Pete: You attended the University of Maryland on a partial competitive jazz dance scholarship.
Lemon: So?
Pete: So, NCAA competitive jazz dance was created as part of Title IX -- because of a program that favored women.
Lemon: Favored women to correct an imbalance.
Pete: You were only hired by the Second City because they needed someone who could remember to feed the theater cat.
Lemon: Oh no, Otis!
Pete: You're gonna hate this one: The only reason NBC picked up The Girly Show is because of flack they got from women's groups after airing the action-drama Bitch Hunter.
Lemon: Oh my God! I'm no better than Toofer. Or Lutz with his B.S. Inuit ancestry. Or you, whose dad was in the Masons with Dave Garraway. I shouldn't be here!
Pete: This is America. None of us are supposed to be here.

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30 Rock

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