30 Rock

Episode Report Card
Michael Neal: B | Grade It Now!

I saw Electric Six last night at a free concert in Brooklyn. It was the new hotness. It was better than your mother, more dependable than your dad. The lead singer looks like one of Philip Seymour Hoffman's asshole friends from Scent of a Woman, but coked out and funnier than everyone. The guitarists looked like Adam Goldberg, Kenny G, and Elton John circa Rocket Man. I looked like Lemon eating a Mars bar on Mars, in a scene from Star Wars. Good time had. Highly recommend -- my Christmas gift to you. Is it really that time of year again, by the way? I guess it is...

Frank pre-apologizes and pre-forgives what is to be done to him, by him at the upcoming office Christmas party. "Merry Ludachristmas everyone!" Ludachristmas, by the way, is why 30 Rock is one of the best shows on television.

Jena makes a similar entrance to the writers' room and feigns surprise that Ludachristmas is tonight. "Ludachristmas is tonight?" she says, feigning surprise. I just repeated myself. I just said the same thing twice. Oh! Just did it again. Oops, I did it again...sakes alive! That's soGroundhogs Day right? Speaking of which, Lemon's brother, Mitch, is a victim of trauma-induced nivea-fascia. The result of a ski accident his senior year of high school, Mitch is mentally stuck in the day before his accident in 1985. Also, he's Andy Richter. Kenneth walks in holding a box of Sheinhardt/Universal PS-575 photo shredders and hands them out joyfully to the room. The room promptly throws them into a trash bin. "Well that's not the Christmas spirit," laments Kenneth. To him, Christmas is about togetherness and family and an open fire and owl meat. On cue, a stripper with a whooping cough walks in early and says, "I'm here to have Christmas meat eaten off my chest at some party?" And the crowd goes wild. All save Kenneth. He walks into Lemon's office to deliver to her a PS-575. She grabs it without looking and chucks it in the wastebasket.

Tracy, Grizz, and DotCom walk in after Kenneth, wearing suits. "Oooh, how was court," nudges Lemon, not realizing that, in fact, they actually were just in court. "Not great, Beth," answers Grizz, and I realize suddenly that the Grizz-loves-Lemon subtext is being carried along faithfully by having Grizz more familiarly address Lemon as "Beth." Again, continuity! Anyway, Tracy is now forced to wear an ankle bracelet for 30 days. If even a drop of his sweat contains alcohol, a signal is beamed to a highly functional ankle bracelet headquarters in Denver, and he goes to jail. Lemon warns Tracy not to attend the Ludachristmas office party and puts Kenneth, Grizz, and DotCom (a familiar threesome) in charge of not allowing Tracy to drink.

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30 Rock




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