30 Rock

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: D | 1 USERS: A-
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Lemon goes to her last resort: Kenneth. He assures her he knows that their problems are just temporary, because he has his own notions about saving the show. Then he takes out his "Idea Journal" to find that, in fact, he only has one idea: "Bird Internet." While he mulls that over, Lemon calls her agent to find out what her Plan B should be. Instead of diminishing her fears, her 15-year-old-looking agent nearly collapses in a panic attack and starts mumbling about doing "something with vampires." He says he hears Twilight and The Vampire Diaries are big, though he's not allowed to see them. Just as he's offering her an audition to star in an Alpo commercial, Lemon cuts him off, reminds him she's a human, and tells him to find her a writing gig.

That night, Jack meets Hank Hooper of Kabletown to assure Hank TWINKS is on track to succeed. Hank tells him, "There's lots of things I like: Fishing, marches by John Philip Sousa, telephones that look like footballs... but there's one thing I don't like -- losing money." Through a tight grin, he says Jack failed and the only fix would be if there were such thing as a gay Jack Donaghy. In a stroke of brilliance, Jack says he knows the very man: Devin Banks. Cut to Devin (Will Arnett) waking up in the middle of the night and throwing a black satin sheet like some sort of homo super hero to run to Jack's rescue.

The next morning, Jack tells Lemon of his plan to hire Devin to run TWINKS. Lemon thinks it's a bad idea, but Jack insists Devin is desperate for re-entry into Jack's elite circle after his social stock with Obama plummeted. As such, he has tracked Devin down in Brooklyn. He plans to spring Devin on Hank Hooper, who is such a traditionalist that "he had his first heart attack when he saw pineapple on a pizza." He thinks Hank will most certainly shy away from Devin, leaving Jack alone to run TWINKS on the DL.

With Jack's problems seemingly solved, Lemon moves on to her own. She asks whether he thinks networks would go for a show about "a girl comedy writer trying to have it all in the city... and maybe she's a vampire." Jack says he likes the last part. He asks why she has a blank notepad with the title "Plan B" at the top. She tells him how the writers fled when she told them about the forced hiatus. He can't believe she wouldn't use more delicate language after their conversation, saying, "I thought we understood each other." She reminds him, "I thought we understood that you were never to think that I understood anything." He is shocked that she hasn't been preparing for the possible cancellation of TGS for the last two years. In her defense, "There have been a lot of Amazing Races on since then, and I had to watch them and go online and comment on them." Jack says she could go to L.A., but she's not interested ever since she had a bad experience driving around in the riot-infested streets of the Rodney King era. Jack scrapes the bottom of the bucket and offers to get her a meeting with Nick Lachey for The Sing-Off.

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30 Rock

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