As instructed, Jack's listening his staff's horrible pitches. Because even when he thinks they're crazy, Jack's a company guy and he follows orders. Frank's is something about kung-fu with a mind-reading black chick sidekick. Pete wants something that switches from porn to basketball immediately for when the kids walk in. Griz and DotCom can't get their slideshow to work. Kenneth proposes making TV more suitable for children, Christians, and the elderly by putting a black bar on the lower half of the screen that keeps you from seeing nudity or soccer. Jack congratulates him on having the worst idea so far. Kenneth is thrilled.
Jenna and Tracy are each in half of the sweatshirt when they three-legged monster into Lemon's office to complain about each other. Pete comes in and tells them to lay off Lemon, who's pregnant. They're both excited and nice about it, even though Tracy's not interested in godfather duties and Jenna is going to need to eat the umbilical cord. They're very sorry for stressing her out, so they leave. She almost stops to tell them the truth, but then realizes the brilliance of everyone thinking she's pregnant, so she takes the sweatshirt and bosses them around some more. Then she tells Pete to get her four egg sandwiches (she is eating for two, after all).
Hank's checking in on Jack's progress on co-worker pitch day; Jack's not crazy about the results so Hank tells him about eating at an Indian restaurant, which seems like it's supposed to be a joke, but I don't get it. Anyway, Jack tells Hank he appreciates that he has his way of doing things, but Jack has his way, too. He says he's a "six sigma black belt ultra with the groin branding to prove it." Hank wonders if Six Sigma is the name of a rock band. Jack would like to share his own idea instead, hoping it will convince Hank that employee pitch day could be better spent drinking brandy and looking out the window. Hank appreciates Jack putting it on the line, so Jack makes his pitch: What if you didn't need a remote control, but could control the TV with just your voice? Brilliant! Jack says, "Television on. Channel NBC." It's Richard Belzer and Ice-T on Law & Order: SVU. Hank thinks it's pretty amazing. Until Ice-T says the word "off" and the TV shuts off. Jack turns it back on, and Belzer says "mute." It mutes. Jack unmutes it. Ice-T says "high volume" and the volume goes way up. Jack turns it back down. Then Belzer says "delete everything that's on my DVR" and it does that too. Hank tells Jack this doesn't seem to work, so he'd like to jump to employee ideas. Jack says he has another idea, but he steals Kenneth's about black bar at the bottom of the screen. Hank loves it, because he doesn't think children should see racy content such as soccer or a woman stuffing a turkey. He thinks it's a family idea, and they could sell ads in the black bar. Jack names it BlaBar (according to the captions). Hank hugs him and says he'll go far. Jack, who's still standing in front of the TV, says "crap" and it flips to Keeping Up With the Kardashians. Nicely done.