Visiting Grandmothers Also Ranks
Lemon: "Why are you going to Miami?"
Jack: "Why does anybody go to Miami? ASS, and the burgeoning art scene."
Lemon's Last Words
Lemon: "Boy it was something landing in this storm, huh? Listen about some of the stuff I said..."
Liz: "One time I laughed at a blind guy eating spaghetti! Sometime I pee in the shower if I'm really tired! I saw my grandparents making love once and I didn't leave right away!"
Big Trouble in Little White Haven
Hotel clerk: "I wouldn't recommend going to Little Hanoi after dark unless you're wearing a 'kon-dong'."
Martini Please, Hold the Tequila
Lemon: "A Manhattan please."
Bartender: "Sure, what kind of bourbon?"
Lemon: "A white wine spritzer please."
Flirting at Farm Aid
Jack: "I'm getting drunk. Lemon would you buy my mulch?"
Let's drill down even more for this one: Gayer than Tom Cruise checking his watch in the volleyball scene in Top Gun.
Rob Sussman: ""Still think I'm 'gayer than the volleyball scene in Top Gun?'"
Once You Go Lemon...
Lemon: "Even Rob Sussman hated me. He was the first gay guy I ever kissed."
Jack: "Rich 50 is middle-class 38."
You're Either With Me or Against Me
Lemon: "If these jagweeds don't want to get to know the nice new me then screw them and their rapidly yellowing teeth."
Don't Push It, Kenneth
Kenneth: "Oh lord, I didn't know. I wouldn't do anything to hurt you. You're my best friend!"
Tracy: "We're not really best friends, we're just good friends."
Silent Comedy Award
David Messenger accepts his award for traveling the farthest distance for a high school reunion dressed in traditional African garb.
No-prize Award Winner
It's Jack. The only thing that New Yorker piece last week got right about the show is that Alec Baldwin is its resident genius. He was flawless in this episode.