30 Rock

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God Vs. McDonald's

Up in Jack's office, Lemon is explaining her dilemma to him. A first date on Valentine's Day is a delicate situation to begin with, and it's made all the more delicate given that handsomeness is involved. She shows Jack a picture of Dr. Baird on her iPhone. "What is this Lemon, a green card thing? Closet case? Slump buster? Bundy-esque serial killer?" Jack takes control of the situation. He tells Lemon to avoid the public by inviting Dr. Baird over for a nice, home-cooked meal. "A stew?" asks Lemon. No, not a stew. His important message to her is try to forget it's Valentine's Day. Jack will be doing the same, thanks to his date with Elisa's Catholicism. He laments the sacrifice, and then, with far away eyes, he offers a food lover's description of the $1,000 Valentine's Day dessert served at the restaurant Plunder. Imagine a dessert for two with Tahitian vanilla bean ice cream in a pool of Cognac, drizzled in the world's most expensive chocolate, covered with shaved white, black and clear truffles, and topped with edible 25-karat gold leaf. On the other hand, he hasn't been to church since he was 12 years old. It doesn't seem like a fair fight. To miss out on the most decadent dessert since Caligula brought peanut butter to a chariot race would be tragic, but Lemon encourages him that he could do both. Go to church with Elisa and then hurry over to Plunder to eat in total decadence. It's what the founders would have wanted: the separation of Church and taste. Yeah? Church and taste... church and state, it's a play on words. I'm so tired. I AM REALLY tired. I'm going to go to bed now. That pun made me... very sleepy. I feel like a bumblebee rubbing its tummy in a vat of molasses, reading blogs by Brad Taylor Negron.

Tracy tells Kenneth that he needs to pull it together, act on his impulses, and ask the sexy and blind Jennifer out on a date. It takes some convincing because, as Kenneth puts it, "There's something about her that makes me all carsick inside," but Tracy accelerates him out of his position of indecision by pouring out water on the floor before Jennifer walks by. She slips and falls, and Kenneth again comes rushing to her aid. Again, they hold hands, but this time when Kenneth goes speechless Tracy swoops in like Cyrano de Bergerac. He pretends to be the silent Kenneth, and charms Jennifer with silky words. "Well, cotton and fiddles! I enjoy your smile!" Tracy (as Kenneth) asks Jennifer out on a date and she agrees.

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30 Rock

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