30 Rock

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Michael Neal: B+ | Grade It Now!
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The Uncanny Valley

Don Geiss waits in Jack's office admiring a picture of Jack on the cover of The Bulb magazine, a GE executive publication. The cover reads "Jack be N.I.M.B.L.E." but I have no thought as to what that is an acronym for. Incidentally, doesn't it feel like every 30 Rock begins in Jack's office? Jack apologizes for keeping him waiting. Geiss has diabetes. He's not feeling well these days but takes comfort in the thought of his daughter finally getting married to Will Arnett's young executive Devon Banks. Banks is to straight as what Tracy is to Republican. He's horrible at it. We get a moment with him hitting on a stubbly floral arranger. Jack assures Geiss that Banks is a fine son-in-law but Geiss cuts straight to the chase. He's not running a family; he's running a business. "I'm going with you. Congratulations. You're running this company." Jack turns into Ethel Merman and begins weeping into his hands. "Oh happy day!" Geiss will wait to announce the news publicly since it requires board approval but he asks Jack to get in line a successor to his job -- someone trustful who will have his back. "I guess that leaves out the Federal Reserve." Big, big money laugh. Theme music!

Lemon and Frank duke it out in the writer's room. Lemon is pissed because Frank decided to download some suspicious email on her laptop and now a virus has wiped out the entire script for this week's show. "First of all the subject of the email was 'Check this out'," argues back Frank. He then blames Lemon because she's the one that created the show to begin with. For some reason this logic takes hold and the staff turns on her in an instant. Lemon storms out but not before confessing that this was never her life's passion. "I had dreams. I was going to live with the Gorillas."

Kenneth, Grizz and Dot Com are trying to guess playing cards in Tracy's dressing room when Tracy walks in visibly upset. "Pay attention to me. I'm inconsolable," he begins with that great narrative glitch in his personality. Tracy dropped in unannounced to his son's school homeroom only to discover it was "Bring Your Dad to School Day." Now Tracy wants to do something that will impress his son, for instance become a Senator or a wizard. The room stops to ponder what his next move should be. "Eureka!" yells Tracy. "We should call Eureka. She always has good ideas."

Blurrrgh! Lemon just popped a Sabor de Doledad Cheeto into her mouth. She's in the supply closet reading the book "More Human Than We" an obvious exploration of apes. I can't say enough about how proud I am of Lemon in this moment. So few people have an awareness of ape history. How we descended from them 80 years ago when an obelisk came out of the Earth and started playing Beethoven's Ninth. Next thing you know we're flying our supercomputers into space. Jack walks in to share with her the exciting news. He's not worried about getting board approval because Geiss comprised it of total cronies and incompetents, including two of his hunting dogs. "Why do I smell self-tanning cream and teeth whitener?" he asks near the elevator and just then Banks saddles up from behind. That does not sound how I meant it by the way. Banks and Jack exchange a handshake and raspy half-threats then Banks invites him to his upcoming bachelor party to be held, curiously enough, on the set of TGS. He walks away as Lemon protests but Jack wants to let it play out. "That man can not be trusted."

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30 Rock

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