30 Rock

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B+ | Grade It Now!
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The Collection

And now, the sequence that made Mr. Sobell choke on his It's-It
Lenny: Have you ever been arrested?
Jack: I have. At the 1976 national Democratic convention. But it's okay. I was there beating up hippies.
Lenny: And what about your family? Any skeletons there?
Jack: My brother Eddie sells faulty sprinkler systems to elementary schools. My cousin Tim fixes NBA games. My mother's an Olympic-level racist, but as for the rest, they're too drunk to do too much of anything. Unless getting thrown out of a Chili's is a crime.

Best throwaway moment -- literally
The first time Jack and Lenny meet, Jack's smoking a cigar through the conversation. He throws it away at the end ... and Lenny picks it up, resumes smoking it, and says as he finishes puffing, "I'll be in touch."

That sketch could feature Andy Samberg as "opportunity cost"
Tracy: Hey, Liz Lemon. I've been reading the newspaper to come up with ideas for some topical sketches. Can we do..."Business Section?"
Liz: Tracy, I love that you're trying to help!
Tracy: Everything is great!
Liz: Thanks to Angie.
Tracy: Where is my lovely wife?
Liz: She had to step out. She had a hair appointment.
Tracy: Oh, I'm going to a strip club now.

So are the big cats only an endangered species between the hours of midnight and seven-thirty AM?
Tracy: You can't ask a bird not to fly. You can't ask a fish not to swim. You can't ask a tiger not to turn back into a Chinese dude at midnight.

It's like someone updated Dinah and the Green Fat Kingdom and took it to a dark place
Jack: It's come to my attention that you no longer have an eating problem.
Jenna: That's ridiculous!
Jack: Is it? You're not breathing heavily. Your skin has cleared up. I even find you slightly attractive now.
Jenna: Don't say that, Jack! Come on! "Me want foooood," right?
Jack: Do you want food, Jenna? Do you?
Jenna: I don't know anymore. I have no appetite. Jack: It's okay. Kenneth! [Kenneth pops in.] Jack: Kenneth is going to be with you 24/7 to keep you fat. Keep Jenna fat, keep Jenna funny. Am I right, Kenneth?
Kenneth: It'll be just like back on the pig farm. I'm going to fatten you up, grow to love you, then my uncles will slit your throat! [beams happily]

He's not in the closet...he's in the jar
Lenny: CEOs don't have thousands of cookie jars. Weird little men in bowties do.

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30 Rock

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