30 Rock

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Michael Neal: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Remember the Early '90s?

Jack tells Lemon in his office that he has a thing for her friend Claire, and Lemon tries to warn him off of her. She's "crazy puddy" and by puddy she means pussy (I think). Only it's too late. Claire walks out of the private bathroom while putting her outfit back on. Ten minutes past the meeting at the elevator and Jack and Claire have already bumped uglies. "Hey Liz. Jack was just giving me directions, uh... to the F train." Lemon backs out of their planned night out and Claire seems oblivious as she walks out. Lemon accosts Jack. "What were you thinking?" Lemon has seen what Claire can do to men, powerful men even. She witnessed Claire take down Scottie Pippen, the drummer for The Bodines, and someone else's boyfriend who ran a small but prestigious clowning academy. "She's crazy. Like 'grab a cop's gun' crazy." Jack tells her it sounds like sour grapes. He's hooking up with Claire no matter what.

Tracy leads a blindfolded Kenneth to the set, and then unfolds him. "Some of the cast of Night Court!" Harry Anderson, Markie Post and Charlie Robinson, to be exact, who played Judge Harry, Christine and Mac, respectively. Harry chimes in first. "This is the sick kid you were telling us about?" Markie Post gives him a racecar, and Kenneth announces that it's the greatest day of his life. First he found a quarter this morning and now -- "Um, I lost a quarter earlier" says Mac reaching for it to be replaced by Kenneth. He may have been rusty, but Mac's still got the timing down.

Jack announces a toast in honor of Mi Yow at the black tie fundraiser for her. After his toast Claire appears in front of a microphone and sings a very Marilyn Monroe happy birthday to Jack while wearing one of her custom hats and a dress painted on using rulers. Jack freaks. He pulls her aside and wants to know how she got in. It's not even his birthday. Jack asks her to leave and Claire makes a scene. "If I kill myself it is all your fault." The crowd gasps. Jack laughs and then snaps-snaps at the band to make with the music. Make with the commercial break.

Jack tells Lemon that she was right about Claire, but then admits to having had sex with her again. "It was quick and in the meat locker. That's okay, right?" Claire told Jack she loves him. He wants Lemon to tell him how to get out of this. "One guy died. Scottie Pippen requested a trade to Houston." I always thought he went to Houston because he hated Jerry Krause. I tell you what, there can't be enough Scottie Pippen jokes in this episode for me. Scottie Pippen's top 10 plays from 1996. Now back to our story. Claire is leaving in a day, so Lemon decides she'll spend a night out with her to save Jack from his own vices.

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30 Rock

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