666 Park Avenue
666 Park Avenue

Episode Report Card
Sara Brady: C | 393 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Sympathy for the Rent-Controlled

Jane and Henry enjoy the symphony, which the closed captions tell me is Beethoven's No. 7 in A Major. It's very bass-heavy and gloomy. A few rows behind them, Gavin watches them creepily. Barlow finds a photo of his next target in an envelope, slid under his door. Nona uses a key to get into apartment 3B and steals Jane's necklace. Monstrous child. Barlow waits on the High Line (maybe?) for his target, then follows the man down to street level. The man falls but Barlow can't kill him. He goes home to Mary, who's become all gray and veiny and kind of looks like Kristen Stewart at the end of Twilight 4: The Spawning. Jane notices that Gavin is staring intensely at the back of her head. She turns and he gives her like four degrees of a smile, which doesn't seem to reassure her.

Jane and Henry arrive home and she looks plastered. Henry basically has to peel her off the wall she's holding up. She asks him to unzip her dress, and he starts taking it off her, but she gets all peevish and pulls away. She lies down on the bed and Henry asks her what's wrong. She says Gavin gave her a weird look during the concert. Henry's like, you're drunk. But she's still pretty freaked out, and asks him if they'll be okay here at 999. Oh my God, this is the longest pilot in HISTORY.

The Barlows' spooky morgue of an apartment. John wakes up to find Gavin sitting at the foot of his bed, still in his tux, although he's undone his bow tie, because it's after midnight and this is how humans project casualness, or so he's read. John asks where Mary is, and Gavin says she's going back where she belongs (Hershel's barn!). Gavin says he expected more of John, but that it's time to settle up, since John didn't hold up his end of their bargain. The walls begin to shake and hands start pushing out of the wallpaper. John gets sucked back against the wall and then sucked through it, screaming, Poltergeist-style. Gavin looks mildly concerned, but it could be the ugliness of the wallpaper that's irking him.

Jane wakes up in the middle the night, asking Henry if he heard anything. Henry doesn't wake up. She goes out in the hall and a ghostly form drifts by while she looks the other way. Jane goes to the stairwell and looks up. The door slams behind her, locking her in the stairwell. Oh, dummy. She looks down the center of the stairwell, and someone is walking up, but we can only see a hand on the banister. Jane calls down but no one answers. She starts walking down, into the basement, because when I'm locked out of my apartment, barefoot and in my pajamas, the first place I go is the creepy basement where a bunch of dudes might have held satanic rituals or circle jerks or cosplayed as St. George.

666 Park Avenue

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