7th Heaven
And Away We Go…

Episode Report Card
Sara M: D | 12 USERS: B+
YOU GRADE IT
And Away They Blow...

Mac is bringing a cell phone (I don't see a charger, but it would count as one item with the cell phone, FYI) and what appear to be blankets.

The redhead is bringing a book by Fannie Flagg, whom I will always love from Match Game, pencils, and a journal that RevCam makes sure to flip through. It's empty, much to his disappointment. Meanwhile, that's a box of pencils the redhead is bringing. Shouldn't one pencil be one item? And would a pencil sharper and pencil count as one item, like the cell phone and charger? And why isn't she just using a pen like an adult already?

The blonde is bringing the most inappropriate items she can: a plant that looks half-dead and hopefully blossoms with all the pot she used to smoke before RevCam got a hold of her, a giant surfboard for what has to be the sole purpose of making an already crammed RV even tighter, and Valley of the Dolls. RevCam grabs the book from her, opens it up to a random section, and reads three words before slamming the book shut, scandalized. He won't even look at the blonde when he ushers her into the RV. Judging from what I've seen of the blonde so far, I'd like to believe that she's going on this trip to sabotage it and making everyone's lives miserable. She seems cool like that.

The Duff girl is bringing a Bible, hair curlers, and a teddy bear. I don't know what her son is bringing, nor do I care. I can't believe they're making me watch this. And then music just drones on and on.

Vid is bringing a baseball, an Etch-A-Sketch, and an 8x10 glossy photo of Angelina Jolie. Way to assert your heterosexuality there, Vid, but don't get your hopes up too high: Angie doesn't adopt white children.

Sam is bringing a Swiss Army Knife, a bag of either rocks or marbles, and a necklace. RevCam is still going through the motions of inspecting each item individually and approving it with a thumbs-up.

Savannah continues to be the cutest thing ever. They actually let her stand and walk this time, and RevCam inspects her dolls and stuffed animals while she shoots him a look of pure disdain. Her third item is a small Statue of Liberty figurine, which I would have thought would be too pointy for a kid so young, but I do like that it symbolizes a future for Savannah where she escapes the RV and moves in with Mary in New York City, home of the truly free.

T-Bag is bringing a huge metal flashlight. RevCam is confused and initially thinks it's a bat, because he's a fucking dumb-ass. Flashlights don't look like baseball bats. Ever. I hope that flashlight has some good heft to it, though, as T-Bag is going to need a weapon to fend off the advances of his inexperienced dentist rapist and/or father. T-Bag is also bringing a first aid kit and a motorcycle helmet.

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7th Heaven

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