7th Heaven
And Thank You

Episode Report Card
And Thank You

Mary continues, saying that Rose shouldn't make the same mistakes that her parents or Mary made. She's still panting from her short run down the aisle, too. Probably because Jessica Biel rushed over there from the set of her latest big-budget movie. She tells Rose that there is a whole world out there. "A big world! Like that thing that they have in school! You know, that um, that, that round thing. You know, that, oh! Oh, what do you call it? Uh… " "A globe?" everyone finishes for her. "That's real. Those are real places!" Mary says. Meanwhile, I'm thinking that Mary's lips and nose are not quite so real. Mary tells Rose to "get out there and see the world! Then make your mistakes." It's sound advice that no one in that family except for Mary ever followed.

Back in reality land, Annie actually sticks up for her wayward daughter, saying that she's "smarter than you give her credit for." And by "you," she probably means Brenda Hampton, not RevCam. Anyway, RevCam's fantasy is impossible since Mary isn't coming to the wedding, as she hates her family. And now it's time for the wedding. RevCam agrees. "They're the ones who have to write their own story in life," he says of Simon and Rose. I'm sure they could write it better than anyone who writes for this show. Then again, so could that snail I accidentally stepped on the other day. Hell, even RevCam Fantasy Dumbass Mary could write it better. Annie says she's ready for the wedding. Is RevCam? "I'd go anywhere with you, babe," he responds. Flashback to Annie showing RevCam the garbage disposal she fixed and him telling her the same thing. They go under the sink and make out. Way to pick those flashback clips, guys. Is it possible that we might see something from an episode that isn't the pilot? Even the people who work on this show couldn't endure having to scan though multiple episodes for clips, I guess. Back in the present, they walk to the ceremony holding hands, which would have been sweet if their marriage was functional.

The commercial break kicks off with the announcer guy welcoming us to "America's Favorite 7th Heaven Smile Moment," sponsored by a toothpaste brand I'll have to remind myself never to buy again. There is an edge of sneer in the announcer's voice. Then we go to the scene where Kevin proposed to Lucy while Jazz Legend Bobby Short sang. Great voting there, America.

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7th Heaven




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