7th Heaven
And Thank You

Episode Report Card
And Thank You

Back from the break, we've skipped past the wedding and are well into the reception. Oh, great; glad we wasted all that time with that fantasy shit so that we couldn't actually see what happened at the real wedding, which this whole fucking show was leading up to. God, I hate this show. It's so bad. And it's about to get worse, because Ruthie has finally made an appearance. Life sure does suck for Mackenzie Rosman, who gave this show her childhood and only got two minutes in the series finale for it. They gave SamVid more screen time than her. Hell, they gave Heather more screen time! They didn't give Happy more screen time, though. Poor Happy; this should be her happiest day and she doesn't even get to share it with us. Anyway, some doofy kid walks up to Ruthie and SamVid and gives them some "sdkfjslfjvsldgsholic drinks." He's Scottish, you see, and was apparently introduced to us last week, as was a storyline about Ruthie wanting to go off to Scotland for the summer to study. Being Scottish is no excuse for his incomprehensible accent though. I mean, I understood what the people in Trainspotting were saying, and I have no idea what this kid is even trying to say. Apparently, this guy likes Ruthie so he's working at the reception for free. He's probably working on this show for free, too. At least he didn't have to actually pay the producers to appear, like I'll bet Heather did. "You Scottish guys sure are charmers," Ruthie says. Maybe so, but they sure can't act for shit. This kid is stand-out awful, and he's in a scene with Ruthie and SamVid, who aren't exactly Olivier. He notices SamVid's moustaches, which must have made for some kick-ass wedding photos, and says he knows a way to get them off, but he'll need Ruthie's "heaaaalllleapeapeaeaepp."

RevCam and Matt talk about how "fun" Simon's wedding ceremony was. Kevin insults them, saying they have a "strange sense" of fun. This entire show has a strange sense of fun. And quality. And life in general. Meanwhile, no one sheds any light on what actually happened in the wedding ceremony. Carlos comes up and says that he had a great time at the wedding, although his own was pretty fun, too. And there's "always a chance" that he and Mary will get back together. Mary didn't come to the wedding, although Carlos says she'll be "at the graduation tomorrow." So she'll see Matt and PC become doctors, but won't see her little brother get married?

SamVid come up with their new moustacheless faces. They say that Scottish Guy, "Ruthie's new boyfriend, used nail [pause while Vid remembers his lines] polish remover" to get them off. And it has the added benefit of being full of fumes that the kids are probably breathing in since the stuff is right under their nose. And, of course, those fun chemical burns! "Oh, yeah. That would work," RevCam says. Then why didn't you think of it, asshole? And how did Scottish Guy know this? And why did he have his own bottle of nail polish remover? Is Ruthie always doomed to have gay "boyfriends"?

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15Next

7th Heaven




Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP