7th Heaven

Episode Report Card
Sara M: F | 2 USERS: F
I Dream of Weenie

Roxanne and Lucy are chatting on the phone. Roxanne is "still" getting emails from Martin's dad. Lucy says that this could be a solution to Roxanne's problem of being a total slut. In essence. She said that in essence. Lucy asks about Roxanne's dad, and I'm really impressed. Usually Lucy thinks of no one but herself. Roxanne says she and her father are heading to the gun range for a little "competition," making a gun shape with her hand and shooting it just in case we couldn't tell what the nature of their competition would be. Roxanne rings off, and Lucy tells Kevin about Roxanne's evening plans. Kevin asks if she wants to go to the gun range sometime. Lucy says no. Kevin says that's probably best, since the little wife is, you know, a bag of crazy hormones and god knows what could happen. Lucy and Kevin decide to take a walk, sealing the deal with a chaste kiss. "I feel...funny," Lucy says. "Was it the pizza?" Kevin asks. Hee. Lucy says she feels funny "in a good way." Kevin says that he does, too, but he didn't want to say anything.

That weird girl is still making eyes at Chandler. He turns away from her and calls Roxanne, but she's not home, so he has to talk to her extremely annoying answering machine message. The girl looks on, her eyes half-closed because it does require a small amount of energy and control of one's own body to keep them open. Chandler finally turns to her and introduces himself, but there's no need. She already knows who he is and everything about him. She introduces herself as "Angela," then tells him to go to "4701 Chapel Lane." Before Chandler can get any more information, a haggard waitress runs in front of her and gives him his pizza, saying that it's on the house because Pete kept Chandler waiting. When the waitress exits frame, Angela is gone. Chandler acts all surprised, but considering that the waitress was standing directly in front of Angela for about five minutes, thus providing her ample opportunity to casually walk away, I'm not sure why.

Holding a pizza box, Chandler walks around outside Pete's, looking for Angela. He finds the waitress and asks her, but she says she never saw anyone sitting next to Chandler in the first place. "Have I been drinking?" Chandler wonders aloud. "No," says the waitress, remembering that Pete's Pizza doesn't have a liquor license, I guess. Chandler decides that he needs to get some rest.

A tiny boombox plays "You're Nobody Until Somebody Loves You." Suddenly, a crapload of professional dancers run into frame, holding mops and twirling around. Asslee and her dad are there, too, although their dancing skills are considerably less impressive. Chandler walks in, holding his pizza box at, as someone on the forums noted, a ridiculous forty-five degree angle. He watches for a while until Asslee "dances" up to him and asks if he wants to join them. Chandler says he just wanted to ask her if Ruthie knows a girl her age named "Angela," who describes as blonde and "cute." Seeing as his description is so glaringly inaccurate, Asslee says she doesn't know anyone like that. She goes back to "dancing" and "mopping," and Chandler waves goodbye, wondering if maybe the cleaning crew should have thought twice before they mixed ammonia and bleach.

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7th Heaven




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