Egads! Simon is playing the guitar. Actually, he's gamely trying to strum out a couple of chords, but it's really not going very well. All right, I have a confession to make. This summer, I did set up a CamDork family in The Sims. Pretty much all they did all the time was gossip about each other, so it quickly got as boring as the show itself. The only highlights I recall were when Simon spontaneously fell in love with Kreepy Kevin, and when he kept trying to play the guitar. He was terrible at it, and all the family members would drop whatever it was they were doing at the time so they could go listen to Simon and jeer at him. Unfortunately, that doesn't happen here. Annie resists the urge to heckle and merely informs Simon that RevCam "is on his way home and wants a family meeting right now." Right now? Because that would be a little hard to arrange unless everyone's in the car with him, and obviously they're not. Simon tries to weasel the purpose of RevCam's meeting out of Annie, but it's obvious that she doesn't have a clue. It's also obvious that she's furious because RevCam hasn't told her about it first.
After Annie leaves, Ruthie speculates annoyingly about the meeting to come, wondering if it's being held because of something Simon did. Simon delivers a long overdue speech when he tells her, "You have no idea what my life is like, so just knock off the accusations and stay out of my personal life." He looks genuinely pissed off when he says it, which makes me laugh. Perhaps he doesn't realize, though, that without the "meddling sibling" crap that masquerades as plot, there really wouldn't be any show at all.
When Annie informs Lucy about the big family meeting, Lucy rudely tells her that she's too busy working on homework to attend. That Lucy -- she's such an intellectual. Her current assignment is to write an outline for her autobiography. The outline is supposed to contain her "greatest accomplishments." Couldn't she have knocked that one off in the time it's taken you to read this paragraph? I think she's really hit the nail on the head when she calls the assignment "creative writing." Annie kindly tries to convince the girl that she's "achieved a lot in [her] life." I have to give Lucy some credit here for realizing that her mom's just humoring her and that her current existence certainly doesn't enrich the planet in any way. She says, "It's not like I gave up my only begotten son so that man could have eternal life." True, but you, like, made out with some guys who weren't totally ugly, and, um...well, didn't you say something intelligent and helpful to somebody once? You see? I care. Upon further reflection, Annie realizes that she may have stretched the truth a little too far, so she tries to salvage the situation by advising Lucy to "make something up." Hey, does anyone remember how Lucy used to be relatively cool and smart in earlier seasons? I do too, and I'd love to see her go back to being studious and intelligent again, but I'm not exactly holding my breath. You probably shouldn't either.