Mary drives up to Frankie and Johnny's trailer and -- hold on. They live in a trailer? Damn. You know, Mr. Spelling, I didn't mind when you named Victoria Principal's character "Gwen" on Titans, but this is too much. However, Frankie and Johnny live in a tiny travel trailer with a built-on extension and wooden porch. Mine's a double wide, and we made our porch out of cement. So there. Frankie and Johnny had better not paint theirs robin's-egg blue, though, or there'll be hell to pay. Baby Mercy is squalling as Mary nears the door. Johnny's yelling, "Could you shut her up?" "I'm trying to clean this dump before Mary gets here! You think YOU could shut her up?" Frankie yells back. How charming. They remind me of a couple we used to hang out with sometimes, actually. They were teen parents, too, and they argued a lot. The wife had dropped out of high school to take care of their baby. The husband dropped out so he could write his own gaming program. I think he's making about a hundred thousand dollars a year now. Isn't that a beautiful story? Baby Mercy shuts up on her own. Johnny comes out and gives Mary a long, tight hug. That earns a punch on the shoulder from Frankie. What a jerkwad Johnny is.
Matt pulls up to Marcia's curb in his car, which looks very much like Mary's. Simon gets out, remarking on Marcia's early curfew. Matt asks Simon if he knows what he's doing. "What's to know?" asks Simon. "It's a movie, it's pizza, it's a goodnight kiss." Matt starts to argue, but Simon doesn't want to hear it. Marcia comes to her door in a pleather-pants-and-skimpy-top ensemble. She looks like a young Neve Campbell, but with long, blonde, Jennifer Aniston hair. "Wow," says Simon. Marcia spells it for him. Why do I know that this will become a very stale joke before the end of the hour?
New Guy Mike shows up at the CamPound with his limp mullet. Lucy leads him to the kitchen and apologizes for her dad's weird behavior. RevCam gave Mike a warm reception because of his interest in college, apparently. Lucy tells Mike that she can't find any of the brochures she brought home. Oh, it doesn't matter, Lucy. You know you're just going to Crawford Clown College, anyway. Mike doesn't mind because he didn't really want to talk about college, anyway. He says, "There are a lot of ways the two of us could help each other besides filling out college applications." Lucy looks askance at him and says "Excuse me?" Yeah -- excuse her? This sounds nefarious to me. Tell me more.