7th Heaven

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Cate: D+ | Grade It Now!

Before he can do that, though, RevCam interrupts a charming bonding session between Dopey and one of the twins. Good thing he walked in on it, or that twin may have received more than three and a half seconds of air time. Eric starts hassling Dopey about getting laid off from the hospital and not having found a job yet, even though he's only been out of work for two days. Dopey claims he has Uncle Hank and some other people trying to find a new job for him. That's fine, but Hank had better not show up in this episode, is all I'm saying. RevCam starts to freak about Dopey's lack of a job, insisting that with supporting a family the size of the CamClan, he needs all the help he can get from the kids. This causes Matt to try to ask if Annie is pregnant. At least that's what I think he's asking, since his dialogue consists of, "Oh, well, but Mom, but Mom's not, you know, she's not, you two didn't." I'm not fluent in Imbecile, so I hope I got that translation right. RevCam leaves the room, looking queasy. What a coincidence -- after watching this scene, I did exactly the same thing here at home!

RevCam passes Simon in the hallway and informs him that he is expected to go out to dinner with his loathsome family. Simon has already made plans, which sounds perfectly valid to me, but not to RevCam. After all his whining about money to Matt, I'd think Eric would be happy that he doesn't have to buy an extra dinner. RevCam's just in the mood to be a dick, though, and he tells Simon, "This isn't the conversation I want to have with my son who's only six weeks away from getting his learner's permit." Simon points out that it's not actually six weeks, only four. Apparently RevCam had told Simon "four weeks" before, and now he's changing his mind, with no explanation whatsoever. Nice parenting. What I don't understand here is why it even has anything to do with Eric. Surely even The Great RevCam can't change Simon's birthday to suit his whims. Simon says, "But the law says I could have gotten it six months ago!" I take a small break from recapping to pick my ass up off the floor, since that's where it fell when I laughed it off. RevCam modestly informs his son, "I am the law in this house," neglecting to mention just how often he is the law throughout the rest of Glenoak as well. Simon argues, very reasonably, "But the law is the law outside of this house, and that law -- the law that every other teenager relies on as protection against overbearing parents -- says otherwise." Simon, you should know by now that nothing within the Glenoak city limits runs according to democracy or logic. Now, I don't remember needing a parental signature when I got my learner's permit, but you just know that if you try to go down to the DMV and get your permit, they're going to ask you for one. They may not ask anyone else for parental permission, but you're special. You're a Camden. And I feel so sorry for you. Mind you, RevCam has every right to keep Simon from actually driving, but I find it hard to swallow that Simon can't get his learner's permit on his own. When Simon invokes the DMV, Eric goes off on a diatribe about how Simon does not live at the DMV, and that the DMV does not buy him things, like the shoes he's wearing. Oh, personally, I'd always just assumed RevCam walked into a store that sells shoes, found out if someone wasn't making their shoe payments on time, and then asked the owner of the store to sign the derelict's shoes over to him. Because that's Glenoak for you.

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7th Heaven




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