7th Heaven
Changes

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Changes

Next up is an expositionary device I particularly detest. We get a close-up of Robbie discussing his feelings about Mary, and as the camera moves back, we see that he's actually talking to the twins! Yeah, I wasn't exactly bowled over by the humour in that either. The twins may be young, but at least they have the good judgment to completely disregard Robbie and everything he says. After what feels like at least three or four decades of Robbie sharing his trite views on love, Lucy walks into the room. Robbie asks her if she wants to talk. She's crying too hard to speak, so she just nods. Robbie goes over to hug her, which is actually pretty moving. Of course, RevCam has to come along and get all nervous seeing two unmarried people having any form of physical contact, no matter how innocent. I didn't think the scene could get any more annoying, but I was so wrong. Ruthie comes along and gawks at the pair for a bit. Okay, that's bad enough, but when she half-sings, "Ch-ch-ch-changes," I have to vomit. What did David Bowie ever do to deserve this? Man.

In the kitchen the next morning, Annie is telling RevCam that she has switched to making decaf coffee, since she recently became sensitive to caffeine. We're supposed to tell that she's extremely stressed out because she spits out every single word she says. Now, that's acting! After telling RevCam to buy a second coffee pot if he wants regular coffee, she storms off. Maybe she just wanted to escape the arrival of the Dopester. Dopey makes another attempt to ask if Annie is pregnant. This time he manages to get the words out -- and in a complete sentence, no less. RevCam doesn't think SuperMom is pregnant, but he's not going to ask her either. We learn that Dopey has found a new job, at a women's clinic. I'm sure he's the perfect candidate for the job, since he has finally learned to say the word "pregnant" out loud. He hasn't quite worked up the courage to learn any other medical jargon yet, since he tells Eric that in addition to treating pregnant women, the clinic also treats "other women with other woman things." And how many years of med school has he been through so far? The whole "woman things" conversation is making Dopey uneasy, so he leaves. RevCam's obviously still thinking about it as he muses, "Is that where [Dopey] should be working right now?" Ruthie overhears and asks him who he's talking to. Eric claims he's talking to God. He says he talks to Him a lot. Ruthie says, "I think you're gonna be talking to Him a lot more. I'm not the only one who's changing around here." She makes sure to emphasize the word "changing," probably because no one else has used any form of that word for the past ten seconds.

Mary and Wilson meet in the park for a discussion. Mary tells him she's been thinking about their impending marriage. Slack-Jaw points out that he hasn't asked her to marry him yet. Heaven forbid that a woman should ask such an important question herself! It's a little disconcerting that Slack-Jaw's hair still looks wet. I'm assuming that this is the middle of the day, and yet his hair hasn't dried? Does he have some kind of magical hair that never dries? I ponder this while Mary explains that the Colonel thinks she "should start taking [herself] seriously." Slack-Jaw has the good manners not to snicker. He's pretty much a sexist jerk, though, since he doesn't want his woman working. He's even less thrilled when he finds out that Mary's new career aspiration is to be a police officer. And why does she want to be a cop, exactly? She explains: "I'm gonna get my own gun and everything!" Um, yay? Fortunately, the youth offence of TP-ing her high school gym two years ago will not get in the way. That's good, I guess, though it would be hilarious to see it come out as a "scandal" -- if you can even call it that -- later in her career. It's unclear whether she told the cops about that half a beer she drank last year, though. In any case, Wilson will not allow her to become a police officer. That's right, he won't give his permission. When Mary stalks off, I actually like her for a few moments. Wilson just sits on the park bench, opening and closing his mouth like a fish.

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7th Heaven

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