7th Heaven

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Cate: C+ | 374 USERS: C+
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Interrupting this cozy bit of bonding is the return of Dopey and Mary. It takes SuperMom a few moments to clue in that Mary is not asleep in her bed and is, in fact, the girl Matt had to rescue from a party. But when Annie does realize this, she makes up for lost time by totally freaking. I can sympathize with her, somewhat, though I'm a little taken aback by exactly how vehement SuperMom gets with her diatribe. And when Mary explains that she met Camille in detention, RevCam says, "Oh, that's a great place to mingle and form long-lasting friendships." That's a little bigoted, don't you think? Hey, I was a National Merit Finalist and a straight-A student in high school, and I still got detentions. ["Me too, and me too. Usually for back-talking. Go figure." -- Sars] And it's not like Mary was in there for weapons offences or, say, something really shocking like smoking in the boys' locker room. She was late for class, period. Dickweed RevCam. Mary offers a very sincere apology, which, for reasons completely unfathomable, makes Dopey feel he must add his own sarcastic two cents: "Oh yeah, that covers it. Talk to me when they're done." He self-righteously storms upstairs to study his Promise Keepers literature, leaving Annie free to play drill sergeant some more. The result is that Mary gets grounded for thirty days. As Mary dejectedly tiptoes upstairs, Annie spits out, "We're glad you're back home safe and sound. You know we love you." She makes it sound really ugly, though. Annie wants to punish Lucy also, but RevCam manfully puts a stop to that, since he claims to have a grand plan "that will put [Lucy] in confirmation class first thing Sunday morning." How delightful that he has found a way to derail SuperMom's parental instincts while simultaneously forcing his daughter to partake of his religion. Now, that's synergy! I'm a little distracted by Annie's black-and-white big-plaid jacket, which looks almost exactly like the plaid coat I had when I was fourteen. In 1981.

7th Heaven

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