7th Heaven
Forget Me Not

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Forget Me Not

Could these episode titles be any cheesier? "Forget Me Not" is all about Alzheimer's Disease (geddit?) and has a couple of annoying "educational" subplots about Y2K and honouring one's commitments. Well, much like just talking about cleaning my rabbits' litter boxes won't get the job done, my just talking about this episode won't get the recap written, so let's plug our noses and dive right in, shall we?

Ugh, I kind of wish I could clean litter boxes instead. The show opens with Dopey and Chickenhead sitting in his apartment, making out. And they're sitting right in front of Dopey's roommate, John. Like, directly in front of him. Like, two feet in front of his face. John can't take it anymore, and he tells them that it's "worse than watching a chick movie." At least John can leave for the library, which he does. Chickenhead's having such a grand old time kissing Dopey that she questions whether she should be going to New York for the weekend. Dopey's all supportive of her going to NYU, which causes her to crown him "the best boyfriend ever!" Aw, shucks! It's obvious Shana doesn't have very high standards, or much dating experience.

Okay, this is the point in the recap where the picture tube in our TV decided to stop working. Not that I blame it. That scene with Dopey and Chickenhead made me feel a little ill myself. I just can't get over the fact that this show really and truly is cursed (see Gwen's first recap). Between mangled tapes, malfunctioning VCRs, stupid thieving postal workers, wacky network time-slot switching and now the death of my boyfriend's big, expensive TV, it's obvious someone doesn't want us mocking this show. So I'll apologize in advance for any details I may miss, since I'm now watching a tinny-sounding 13-inch TV from all the way across the apartment. On the upside, it does ease my pain a little, not being able to see it all in vivid detail.

Anyway, Dopey encourages Chickenhead to go to NYC for the weekend so she can find an apartment for when she moves there in January. Chickenhead says she knows it will be hard, but they can make their long-distance relationship work. Then she gets up and leaves without saying goodbye. In fact, she leaves without even saying that she's leaving. It always cracks me up when TV writers do this. I figure they leave out details like that so you won't be distracted from the drama, but if I were talking to somebody who just got up and left in the middle of our conversation, without even saying goodbye, I'd be pissed. And confused, which is how Matt looks right about now. Or else he's concentrating really hard, trying to remember if he has any more lines in this scene. I'm really not sure.

Over at the CamPound, the elders have summoned Mary to congratulate her on passing the thirty-day evaluation of her diversion program. Golly, what exactly would "passing" this evaluation entail anyway? All she has to do is show up, pick up trash, and not mouth off to her supervisor -- hardly cause to break out the sparkling non-alcoholic grape juice, is it? Mary credits her stunning success to The Amazing Robbie. She says having someone to talk to who knows exactly what she's going through is the only way she could have come this far. Mary, dear, you've been picking up garbage after school for a month, not working on a chain gang for the last twenty years. And speaking of punishment, my eyes hurt from having to look at your horrendously ugly black-and-grey fitted baseball shirt with the bizarre cutouts in the shoulder area. Mary points out how helpful it is that Robbie also knows what it's like to be arrested, at which point SuperMom laughs nervously. After Mary leaves, RevCam says, "They're still on separate work shifts down at the program, aren't they?" SuperMom responds, "Yes, but we said Robbie could call her," except she's over-enunciating weirdly and has a look on her face that suggests Robbie is an ax murderer or the Antichrist. Away with ye, Satan!

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7th Heaven




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