Annie walks into a pawnshop and says hi to "Rocky," a.k.a. Tim Conway the Terminally Untalented. Okay, and why is Annie on such good terms with the owner of the town pawnshop? Annie asks Rocky if he ever got a buyer for the jukebox he had in the window. He says he got some lookers, but no buyers. "Yes, I know," says Annie. Then why did she ask? What a waste of Tim Conway's time, although I'm sure he has plenty to spare. She asks if she can trade something for it, then offers up her mother's ugly-ass cross, saying that her mother left her other jewelry that's "more practical" (what, like a ring that doubles as a food processor?), and she never found a chain nice enough to wear it on, so she thinks she can part with it. Tim Conway says he can't take it. Annie says she wants to give RevCam something really nice, since she won't be able to afford anything after the twins are born and he's been so tolerant of her during her ca-RAZY pregnancy and all the "heck" she's put him through. She's sure her mother would approve. I don't she would approve at all. I think she would say, "If your stupid husband would just wear a freaking condom, you'd be able to buy twenty jukeboxes without having to trade any of the stuff I gave you, you ungrateful cow!" ["I think she'd also tell her daughter to quit ripping off O. Henry. I hate this goddamn show." -- Sars] Tim Conway points out that it's a cross, which we all knew already, but thanks anyway, Dorf, and Annie says that she wears her religion in her heart, which is also where she keeps her mother's memory. Tim Conway sighs. "It's gonna be a long show," he thinks.
At the mall, it's Ruthie's turn to sit on Santa's lap. Jenny bends down to take a Polaroid of this special moment, at which point she magically realizes that Matt is Santa, even though he's wearing a beard that covers most of his face and a hat that covers his signature greasy hair. Ruthie recognizes her brother as well, and pulls his beard down and screams. The bitter elf grabs the Polaroid and takes a picture. Then he smiles. I love the elf. We go to commercial with a shot of the picture developing. Suffice it to say, neither of them is looking their best.
Back at the CamPound, Lucy is (what else?) whining to RevCam about how she's been calling people about the nativity scene auditions all day. Except not really, since we've seen her in the garage and her bedroom, and she certainly wasn't working on the nativity scene there. RevCam offers her a ride to the church in lieu of sympathy. She says no one is even going to show up, and she'll be spending the day staring at the wall. RevCam suggests taking her shoeshine kit along to keep herself occupied. Lucy does not appreciate the humor. That's okay, because RevCam is having a grand old time laughing at his own joke. I'll give it to him.