7th Heaven
High And Dry

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Martin's being quiet at dinner, so Asslee asks him what's wrong. Martin says he's been thinking about Asslee and college and stuff. Martin recaps everything Asslee just said in the beginning of the episode, and says that maybe they should break up. Asslee says they can't, since he's really the only excuse for her to still be on this show. Martin says they shouldn't get "too serious" about each other if they have no future together. Asslee responds by smirking stupidly.

Back at the restaurant, Kevin tells Lucy that he loves her, and she gets all pissy, accusing Kevin of drinking too much champagne while she was in the bathroom. He asks Lucy again if she wants champagne, to which she responds that she's "sorry" Kevin has to "ply" her with alcohol. Kevin says he's not trying to ply anything; he just wants to get his money's worth out of his two hundred dollar bottle of Cristal. Now Lucy's angry with him for spending his own money on something he thought she would enjoy.

Back at the CamPound, Sam is moving all his stuffed animals into Simon's room. Ruthie tells Sam he can't move into Simon's room because it's Simon's room. "Simon doesn't live here anymore," Sam sort of says. Watching these two interact is very, very painful. Fortunately, it's interrupted by the piercing shriek of the CamPhone. It's Paris calling, who announces herself with her first name. None of my friends' parents ever did that, but then, none of them were ever named after European cities. Cheesy Split Screen comes back to capture both sides of Ruthie and Paris's scintillating discussion for about two seconds, and then goes away. Ruthie tells Paris that Peter isn't around; Paris tells Ruthie that Peter isn't with Vic. The Clarinet of Missing Children plays its sad tune.

Mr. and Mrs. Johnson talk about their bedroom exploding with color. They want the entryway to their bedroom to be a "focal point" for the entire house, and I don't really know much about this sort of thing, but that is stupid. Shouldn't the focal point of a house be somewhere that most people will, like, see? Unless the Johnsons are part of some swingers organization, in which case, I don't want to know. The phone rings, and it's Ruthie. She tells RevCam about the Mystery of the Missing Peter in yet another Cheesy Split Screen. RevCam gets way too concerned and tells Ruthie to call Lucy and Kevin and tell them what's going on, even though they're right in the middle of celebrating their first anniversary. He says he'll be right home. RevCam and Ruthie hang up, and RevCam goes back to Annie and the Johnsons and says there's a family emergency and they need to leave. The Johnsons react with concern while Annie reacts with what appears to be a grand mal seizure. Seriously, Catherine Hicks: dial it down a few notches. The CamRents walk about two feet away from the Johnsons and Annie turns to her husband to thank him for the "phony excuse." RevCam says that there really is an emergency: Peter's missing.

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7th Heaven

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